NationStates Jolt Archive


Wombat News: Ulster Catholics Thank the Provos

Wombat News
30-11-2004, 23:23
Belfast; Wombat News

The 600,000 Catholics of Northern Ireland marched this afternoon to pay grateful tribute to their staunch defenders, the Provisional IRA, against thirty years of constant British attacks. (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=377577) Spokesman Brian Fitzpatrick noted that the Provisional IRA’s 30 years of steadfast defence of Ulster Catholics from the Brits was “definitely appreciated”.

"Without the Provisional IRA, we'd have been massacred by the evil Protestants and the British army for sure," said community leader Patrick Fitzbrian, adding "If it wasn't for the Provisional IRA’s brave refusal to give up detonating bombs in pubs and shopping centres, massacring children and shooting policemen in the back, the Catholics of Northern Ireland would be an isolated and powerless group indeed."

Many present at the rally reminisced over happy memories of occasions on which the Provisional IRA had acted quickly to defuse potentially Catholic-endangering situations. “I remember one time there was a Protestant family in this neighbourhood," said Berty Hernia, a local pensioner, "and we were all terrified. But the boyos stepped in and, fair play to them, they firebombed the place until the Prods had to go. If they hadn't done that, sure the situation might have got out of control."

Catholics added that as long as the British Government continued to plot against the children of Eireann, they would always need the brave, hooded men of the Provisional IRA to plant car bombs, intimidate business leaders and shoot the knees off drug dealers and teenage joy-riders.

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Green Flag Ireland
01-12-2004, 02:00
Hmmm...once I get a standing government, I'll be sure to make an official response.
Steel Butterfly
01-12-2004, 02:16
Hmmm...once I get a standing government, I'll be sure to make an official response.

lol...you should be told that Wombat News isn't always...to be taken seriously...haha
Thelas
01-12-2004, 03:15
OOC: WOMBAT! Good to see you again!
Scolopendra
01-12-2004, 03:49
*winces* This is funny...? Supposed to be funny? Poigniantly sarcastic?