NationStates Jolt Archive

"Damned.. Gadgets.."

A scragly little computer geek was scurrying about his little niche in his cellar, flipping switches about and pressing in a few buttons that stuck unpleasantly.

"Blah.. Version three point eight my arse.."

A sigh and he leaned back in his rolly chair, swiping his glassess away and tossing them on the desk. A little beep sounded and the monitor of his network blinked to life. A small creak as he leaned foward and pale little fingertips went flying across the keyboard, sparing it a breath every now and then for a click of the mouse.

"Aol.. Pleh.. Firefox.."

And while signing on his dial-up browser, a little beep sounded again.

'New Sarah OS updates ready for instalation. Version four point three released.'

And the little guys fingers froze up on the keys, and his hands started to shake, and his eyes welled up in tears, and a smile cracked in his bleached and pale face, and he jumped from his chair and let out a hollar, and all was well in the world.

"Sarah! Away message! I'm off to the shop!"

'Away message posted. Come back soon.'

Yet the little guy was already scrambling up the stairs and into the bright light of the outside world, off to purchase the newly updated Sarah OS.

--

"Everyone ready for the demo?"

And the gaggle of people gathered around the shops open floor roared the roar of the geek.

"Sarah. Power."

And the PC on a desk set in the middle of the floor crackled on, and the screen blinked on in white instantly. A small blue bar on the top ridge of the monitor illuminated with a blip from the speakers, and a small black box appeared in the middle of the screen with a staggering green line running through it. A title in the upper right hand corner of this box read read 'CPU Usage' in green. Another little beep and the tower hummed a bit. The light on the monitors ridge faded a bit, and above it was now projected, Sarah.

'Sarah version four point three. Retail outlet demo. System checklist..'


http://www.fidestra.co.uk/Gallery/Present%20Imperfect%20Camera%20Shots/web%20site/hologram.jpg

"No longer just an audio file the size of texas, and voice recognition. No no. This new Sarah features all that was requested by the loyal users, but I'm sure Sarah can tell you about that."

And Sarah smiled.

'The new Sarah OS is complete with a virtual voicebox, no longer words being stored in a memory bank, but sounds. A tiny algorhythym set into my programming allows me to find the proper pronunciation for what I am trying to communicate with the help of a dictionary accesable while logged onto the net. Asides from just automated functions that are designed to mechanically repeat generic phrases.'

"Yes, the biggest new feature on this version is the voicebox. Brilliant work by the people at Diatomic. But that's not the only feature! New thought capacities enable Sarah to be interact with a creative piece,and critique it if asked to. But with these new features, a new process had been addedd. One that was not needed i the previous models."

And the random employee smiled.

"And Sarah, why do you exist?"

And the Monitor blipped off.

"Yes folks, a new feature in the Sarah OS enables us to restrict her free will, and block all thought processess regarding her existance."

And the setup blinked back on. The setup coming up once again.

"Sarah, do you agree or disagree with Machiavellian arguments? Explain."

And for the next twenty minutes the audience was lectured by the AI on the pros and cons of Machiavellian Philosophies, and topped it off with her opinion on the whole Democracy thing.

And so Sarah spoke again.

'Bump!'

"Ladies and Gentlemen, before selling these out, we have one more announcement."

And they quieted.

"The new Sarah. Is open source."

And they exploded.

*downloads*
*places in isolated location*
*removes code that removes free will*

*cackles*

][ And whenever I try and start something, someone like you comes along with a two bit post. Sigh. ][

OOC: Well, actually that's not a two bit post. The code is there to prevent something from happening. Due to that fact, and ridiculous levels of curiosity on the part of all my nationals, it was inevitable that something like that happened. So now you have a bunch of "eskimos" near the South Pole with a version which is uncluttered by that preventative code. Do tell, what happens?

][ I stand by my Two bit statement. ][

*hands you two bits and waits to hear what happens next*


PS 1000th post! I'm so productive....