NationStates Jolt Archive


Brochure; 'Beauty is only as deep as your wallet.'

Fodmodmadtol
31-08-2004, 18:38
Kay Medical.
Where beauty is only as deep as your wallet.

We care about you

Are you finding your hollow and meaningless life, even more hollow and meaningless than ever before? Are you desperately scratching in vain at whatever was once left of yourself which is now being plucked apart by the vultures of society? Are you clinging with every last ounce of strength left in your pathetic form at the youth of your former life?

Well, let us reassure you- You are a failure.

But! With the help of Kay Medical, we can turn your life around!

http://www.visitdelaware.com/mainimages/din3.jpg

Beauty is everything

To be successful in this life, you need to be beautiful. You cannot accomplish anything without beauty! Being attractive is the only thing that counts. Without this, you are nothing and ARE indeed leading a hollow and meaningless life. Do you want your life back? Don't you want to BE something?

Here's how we can help

Here's how we can help you be, something.

We here at Kay Medical have developed state of the art techniques to enhance your beauty, your life, and in essence, you. We will make you better. We will make you attractive. We will make you somebody.

Available offers are such natural treatments as Monkshood facials, Cocoa baths, Lavander-oil rubdowns, and Clamshell veneers. Also available are Aromatic therapies, Multi-sensory stimulus, Cosmetic Surgeries, and an assortment of Gene therapies. All of these are designed specifically to improve your image.

Remember, we at Kay Medical, care about you.

Consultation

Contact Kay Medical today for a free consultation, and let's see what we can do for you. Contact us today!

http://www.sexual-truth.com/happy-woman.jpg

Ooc: And of course that brochure is sugar coated to the point of a diabetic coma. So it will go along the lines of some down in the dirt schmuck, or vain arrogant jackarse, feeling bad about the way they look getting a brochure something like this, and feeling even worse about themselves! Get them a heap of money and just waddle 'em in. Ooo.. Emotional turmoil, Financial drain, corruption and controversial methods! Protesters wouldn't be turned down. This will just be the sign up if anyone's interested.
Fodmodmadtol
31-08-2004, 21:13
Just listen to these testimonies!

'I was only a lowly schmuck. An ugly worhtless person who lived by on only a salary of two hundred thousand dollars yearly. I could only attract those at stripper level beauty, and nothing more! I felt so ugly! There was even a wrinkle! Then I met the people at Kay Medical. They changed my life forever! Now I'm thw hotshot around the office, which I now manage! People flock to me like bananas to a sundae!'

Don't beleiev it? Here's another, for repeating ourselves will surely get the point across!

'I was living in a back alley of some slum dining on my feces and drinking from the gutter in which the wive on the second story dumped her bleach into daily. My skin was falling off due to leporosy and I had no legs. Kay Medical changed my life! After my treatments, I even changed my name to match my life! Now everyone calls me Orlando Bloom.'

Call us today!

/Bump
Mirruin
31-08-2004, 21:38
All right, time to kill the plastic surgons...
:sniper: :mp5: :gundge: :upyours:
Fodmodmadtol
31-08-2004, 21:41
][ Please don't do that in my sign up thread, kay? ][
Hadula
01-09-2004, 02:42
"Ooh, stripper-like beauty!"
- Random Pedestrian, reportedly heading for a licensed brothel

"Needles, heh, I don't mind needles."
- That Guy that stands in the corner of the bar and mutters to himself
Fodmodmadtol
01-09-2004, 15:50
Just listen to these testimonies!

We're responsible for Michael Jackson!

Contact us today!

/Bump
Fodmodmadtol
02-09-2004, 01:59
You know Brad Pit? You know Donald Trump? SAME PERSON! OUR WORK! Conatct us today!

/Final bump beofre I give up. I had so many hopes for this for some reason.