NationStates Jolt Archive

Beaverville- As all Kochbaldians know, president Bob Harrington was assasinated a few weeks ago. The culrpit is unknown, but the reward is 5 million Kochas. Anyways, Gregory Koch was sworn in as the second president. Well, as you know, Koch makes his home in Beaverville. Well, he received several letters in the mail, none having a return adress, and they all read:
Dear Mr. Kochbaldian President,
It is brought to my attention that the United socialist states of kochbald has an increasing tax rate, decreasing political freedoms, and has just been divided into 8 states, North, Northeast, East, Southeast, South, Southwest, West, and Northwest. The people strongly disapprove of this and so do we here at the U.T.I. We wish to destroy Kochbald. Kochbald is a big [expletive] and ought to be destroyed. We are threatining to destroy Kochbald and kill you if you do not do something about this soon.
Signed,
ì?’+-T ùÄ4++Pt?
Head of United Terrorist Institute
Any information leading to what is happening will be rewarded by a sum of 5 Million Kochas. All international transportation into Kochbald has been cancelled until further notice, and you must go through security at every building and attraction except your own house,

Nobody gives a damn, and I'll tell you why.

Your reward of five million kochas is very misleading. In case you didn't know, 1 kocka = .00000243 US dollars, which comes out to twleve dollars and 15 cents. That will only buy you a loaf bread and a britney spears cd in my region. So, take your measly reward, and die.

If it makes any difference, I killed Mr. Harrington.

You can keep the reward.

Two things.
1) AH46, you are under arrest
2) 1 Kocha equals $1.25 Us, so the reward could buy you the company that makes the bread, and front-row tickets to Brittney Spears.

Update- The culprit has been found, and it is not AH46. AH46 is still in trouble for giving a false report, but not as much. The culprit is Doodoo Doodoo, winner of the Tour de Kochbald, and presidential candidate in 2010. He is 22, and will be replaced on the ballot by his 2-year-old sister Lulu Lulu (Doodoo changed his last name) who was the one who wrote the letter, but can not be punished because she is two. Lulu will be running against Sparrow Smith and probably many other xandidates who do not have a chance in winning.