NationStates Jolt Archive

Common Sinoese pick up lines:

1. "How about we get together and conduct a horizontal Long March? Let's make that longer than the Great Wall." (Said jokingly as Sino has outlawed pre-/extra-marital sex.)

2. "You're so beautiful it's difficult to look away." (Rumoured to have been used by some of the government's elite *COUGH: General Liu*.)

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NS need humors too!

1. Better red than dead

"Why don't we go back to my place & bat some balls around?"

(Extra-marital sex is very rare in my nation, but it does happen now & then.....above line comes clear when you examine my flag :) )

"Your father must be Gen. Ronzoni, because your finger-licking good." - Gen. Ronzoni is the mascot for Il Bertini's restaurant chain. They are the closest thing to Fast Food in Agrigento. The motto of Il Bertini's is "Mmm...Finger-licking good!"

"They say you are what you eat. If we start now we can be each other by morning" - Once again playing on the food theme, which is central to Agrigentian Society.

"Do you have any Saldenian in you? " they answer no. "Do you want some?" - This one comes from the southeastern island of Saldenia, home to 1/3rd of the population.

"I lost my teddy bear... can I sleep with you?" - This one has kinda lost favor, because it is too easy to turn into an insult.

"You must be a parabola, because I want to lie tangent to your curve" - If you want to sound obnoxious and like a geek, this is a good one to use.

"Could I line you up against the wall and bayonet you with my weapon?"
*Commonly used by soldiers that flunk out before the end of military school

"Why don't we go to my place and warm each other up?" Ah, the joys of living in a subarctic nation. :headbang:

"Hejida, wanna do a Tia~e?"
(Soccer star Milan Tia~e was known for his affairs and extramarital sex)

"Let's go to my house and watch TV-R!" if the person disagrees "ok, Esvortu 1!"
(TV-R is state TV station, Esuvortu 1 the private sports channel)

"Are you from Karela?" (the other person will surely say no since Karela is a small place) "so don't deny when I ask you for a coffee!"
(deny and defend are the same word in some rejistanian languages. Karela lines is the most defensive soccer team in the H1SR)

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Laughter is addictive. We need more!

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OOC (to _Taiwan): "Bayonet you with my weapon." Is that how Chen gets his p*ssy?

YOUR GUYSES ARE WEEEAAAAKKK!!

That shirt is very becoming on you... if I were on you... Id be coming too.

You know that Mcdonalds is coming out with a new sandwich... yah there gonna name it after you... Its called... the McBeautiful.

"Why don't we go back to my place & bat some balls around?"

(Extra-marital sex is very rare in my nation, but it does happen now & then.....above line comes clear when you examine my flag :) )

That's rotten! Two dykes on a sacred piece of fabric you call flag!

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More, but not the last from Sino:

"My Howitzer has yet to see action." (Obviously used by males only).

http://www.sinodefence.com/army/artillery/tubeartillery/203_1.jpg


"Wanna come over and check out my air raid bunker?" (A play on the theme of vigilance.)

BUMP (not hump)

Want me to take 'em out? Give me a hell of a headache, but I could probably thin the herd a little.

Wanna combine crosses?
[play on the Imperial flag, which bears a combined Catholic/Orthodox Cross]

You don't sweat much for a fat chick
(Voted most ineffectual chat-up line at Lucktopia singles meet-up day)
-Lucktopia is Luckdonias Capital city

"Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!" used by drunks.

"If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning."

"The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word."

[Terminator voice] "Yer clohs-- gib dem to me."
Used by teens, after watching he movie.

"They call me Milk, because I do your body good"

"Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me"

Bump

"so......live around here much?" Common Vaadian pick up line.

More From Sino:

"Please do not misunderstand, 9mm is the caliber." (Guns and the Sinoese soldier are inseparable).

http://www.warlink.com/news/UploadFiles/200312995740302.jpg

"Ever had a good time with someone with my rank?" (Commonly used by senior officers major and above. Rumoured to have been used by Gen. Liu when he was a major).

"You have been authorized to take a ride on my Dong Feng ballistic missile TEL (Transport Erector Launcher)." (Obviously another male only one).

"Its not October the 1st but my DF-31 feels like it is." (Another pun on the whole ballistic missile theme. Oct 1st is the Chinese National Day, complete with annual military parades in Sino.)

http://www.sinodefence.com/nuclear/icbm/df31_1.jpg
Above: Chinese DF-31 ICBM TELs on National Day parade.

OOC (to Xiaguo): FHY (F*ckin' Hell Yeah)!!!

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More please!

Bump

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Explicit or subtle ones are both fine.

"With one touch, I'll have you making sounds they'll hear on AC."
[AC: Alpha Centauri, 4 Light Years away from Earth; the Empire has a colony there]

"They say in space, no one can hear you scream... wanna find out?"
[said on the transports leaving the solar system, or on the orbital stations]

"Let's make like the dominions."
[Said only in the capital, usually by those who work in the Houses of Parliament; The Dominions recently joined with the Empire in the Act of Union]

"My transport leaves tomorrow... do you mind if I take my shuttle through your wormhole?"
[said by males only, and it usually results in a slap to the face or a knife to the gut]

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Let the lines roll in like tanks coming off the production line!

"Nice shoes. Wanna ****?"

I know, I know, this one's common the world over. However, it's especially prevalent in Copiosa Scotia, where you can't be sued for asking such questions.

"C'mon young soldiers, march in through your motherland!"

"C'mon young soldiers, march in through your motherland!"

Soldiers don't f*ck moms!

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More is needed, like enriched uranium.

"LIU YOU DUMBASS."
LOL

No, I meant them to be the earliest stage of life. What looks like a tadpol, but grows up to be a human?

Is that a laspistol in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

Well if you dont want to go out with me a little mindwipe may convince you otherwise

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We demand more examples, of higher quality.

"Baby, I'll make you redder than the Soviet flag" (We're socialists)

"You'll be shouting 'Long live the Revolution!' when I mount you on my hammer and sickle."

"I spread the red, while you spread your legs."

Now some Corporate ones...

"I'll make your hole bigger than Microsoft baby"

"I wanna get on you more than a CEO is sued."

"Unlike Sergei, I'd do you anyway" (Our President is not a lady's man...)

Those good?

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Somehow, the subtle ones are funnier.

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Somehow, the subtle ones are funnier.

And those ones ARE?...

And those ones ARE?...

When it becomes too blatant the woman slaps you in the face and it's "Score!" for her.

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the favorite pick up line in cap ebola:

"hey baby! wanna fu**?"

the traditional answer:

"fu** you! you stupid muthafu**a! i'm gonna eat your penis on a stick!"

then the two walk home together (sometimes they take a taxi)

those wacky cap eboleans!

mahalo!

the favorite pick up line in cap ebola:

"hey baby! wanna fu**?"

the traditional answer:

"fu** you! you stupid muthafu**a! i'm gonna eat your penis on a stick!"

then the two walk home together (sometimes they take a taxi)

those wacky cap eboleans!

mahalo!

That's FUBAR!

the favorite pick up line in cap ebola:

"hey baby! wanna fu**?"

the traditional answer:

"fu** you! you stupid muthafu**a! i'm gonna eat your penis on a stick!"

then the two walk home together (sometimes they take a taxi)

those wacky cap eboleans!

mahalo!

Im disturbed.... deeply disturbed.

Bump

LRR society is noticeably grim, with little being said in the way of jokes.

Of course, among friends most humor involves being drunk and singing loud, raucous drinking songs. Monty Python and other comedy movies/shows are especially popular.

Here's one for Sino:

I Like Chinese
Sung by Eric Idle
[talking]
The world today seems absolutely crackers,
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high.
There's fools and idiots sitting on the trigger.
It's depressing and it's senseless, and that's why...

[singing]
I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're always friendly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today.
You'd better learn to like them; that's what I say.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They come from a long way overseas,
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese food.
The waiters never are rude.
Think of the many things they've done to impress.
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching, and Chess.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese thought,
The wisdom that Confucious taught.
If Darwin is anything to shout about,
The chinese will survive us all without any doubt.

So, I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please.

All together.

[verse in Chinese]
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Ni hao ma, ni hao ma, ni hao ma, zaijien!
(How are you, how are you, how are you, goodbye!)

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
Their food is guaranteed to please,
A fourteen, a seven, a nine, and lychees.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees...

I just couldn't resist!

One of the more popular drinking songs:

Accountancy Shanty
Sung by Eric Idle
Its fun to charter an accountant,
And sail the wide accountancy,
To find, explore the funds offshore
And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.

It can be manly in insurance.
We'll up your premium semi-annually.
It's all tax-deductible.
We're fairly incorruptible.
We're sailing on the wide accountancy!

Im disturbed.... deeply disturbed.

Maybe in Cap Ebola, the straightjacket is their national costume. LOL!

"Is that beauty legal?"

"Hejida Syku!" (works in parts of northern Rejsitania, where that name is extremely common)

(if a man wants to make a real nice compliment:) "Are you from Xedeja?" (answer is 'no') "oh, I thought that is the place where goddess Xentakansa comes to earth."

*Puts on Reviewing March ( http://english.pladaily.com.cn/special/jygg/mp3/Track%206.mp3 ) on a pair of headphones with max. volume! Drowning out the hippy propaganda.*

Stereotypically, Sino is mostly inhabited by soldiers and the 'national costume' is khaki. LOL!

All I can say, Sino, is that you have horrible taste in music. I mean come on! Some crazy military march? Its a waste of time.

LRR society is noticeably grim, with little being said in the way of jokes.

Of course, among friends most humor involves being drunk and singing loud, raucous drinking songs. Monty Python and other comedy movies/shows are especially popular.

Here's one for Sino:

I Like Chinese
Sung by Eric Idle
[talking]
The world today seems absolutely crackers,
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high.
There's fools and idiots sitting on the trigger.
It's depressing and it's senseless, and that's why...

[singing]
I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're always friendly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today.
You'd better learn to like them; that's what I say.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They come from a long way overseas,
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese food.
The waiters never are rude.
Think of the many things they've done to impress.
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching, and Chess.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese thought,
The wisdom that Confucious taught.
If Darwin is anything to shout about,
The chinese will survive us all without any doubt.

So, I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please.

All together.

[verse in Chinese]
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Wo ai zhongguo ren (I like Chinese)
Ni hao ma, ni hao ma, ni hao ma, zaijien!
(How are you, how are you, how are you, goodbye!)

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
Their food is guaranteed to please,
A fourteen, a seven, a nine, and lychees.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees...

I just couldn't resist!

One of the more popular drinking songs:

Accountancy Shanty
Sung by Eric Idle
Its fun to charter an accountant,
And sail the wide accountancy,
To find, explore the funds offshore
And skirt the shoals of bankruptcy.

It can be manly in insurance.
We'll up your premium semi-annually.
It's all tax-deductible.
We're fairly incorruptible.
We're sailing on the wide accountancy!


SHWEEEET!

All I can say, Sino, is that you have horrible taste in music. I mean come on! Some crazy military march? Its a waste of time.

OOC (*Puts on the voice impersonation of a trumpet*): Troop Reviewing March

SHWEEEET!

Songs like those treat us like f*ckin' p*ssies! It offends me that the Chinese are viewed as timid little pigeons.

My current RP playlist (some real music for RP'ing on NS):

- USA 01 (Generals)
- USA 03 (Generals)
- Industrial (Tiberian Dawn)
- USA 04 (Generals)
- USA 08 (Generals)
- USA 10 (Generals: Zero Hour)
- China 04 (Generals)
- The Imperial March (Star Wars)
- March to Doom (Tiberian Dawn)
- Creeping Upon (C&C: Covert Ops)
- Reviewing March (an old Chinese Army marching tune)

I'm also a major C&C fan.

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Let's not get sidetracked.

My current RP playlist (some real music for RP'ing on NS):

- USA 01 (Generals)
- USA 03 (Generals)
- Industrial (Tiberian Dawn)
- USA 04 (Generals)
- USA 08 (Generals)
- USA 10 (Generals: Zero Hour)
- China 04 (Generals)
- The Imperial March (Star Wars)
- March to Doom (Tiberian Dawn)
- Creeping Upon (C&C: Covert Ops)
- Reviewing March (an old Chinese Army marching tune)

I'm also a major C&C fan.

I listen to music from A) Chrono Trigger or FFVI-FFXI or music from Eve-online.

Walking into a dwarf bar...
"Gold gold gold, gold gold gold........gold gold gold........"
"You missed 'gold'. It's 'gold gold gold', not 'gold gold gold'"
<war yodel>
<whiteish stuff begins to fly>


Walking into a Weyrean bar...
Me likes hentai,
Me likes hentai,
It's all so tentacly
with seree muun...

On the street.....
"Is that an SK-41 semiautoboomstick?"
"No, it's an SK-49 fullautoboomstick. See the phallic knob on the barrel?"
"Oooh! Macho man!"
"I'm a transvestite."
"It's all good!"

To her father / brother / other guardian: “...and so, Sir (or my lord), I was wondering if I might have permission to seek your daughter’s (sister’s, whatever’s) favor at the coming ball.”
Proper use: Call on her father specially beforehand. Appear in finest dress and with your best carriage and team. After all, her father has to invest in the dowry - make sure he knows it’s going to a proper family. Always precede by several compliments about his wife, house, and lands. Sound confident in your ability to win her hand.

Before the March: “I declare, mademoiselle, you do grow more beautiful every time we meet.”
Proper use: Most effective with a slight smile directly after kissing her hand. Tone of voice is important, lest this be mistaken for simple social niceties.

During the Grand Ball: “My pardon, mademoiselle, but I was wondering if you might honor me with this dance?”
Proper use: preferably before the minuet or another reputable couples dance; certainly not before something downright scandalous, such as the waltz (unless the courtship is well progressed). Follow up by extending one’s right arm for her to take. At the end of the Ball, offer to escort her to her father’s coach

Naturally, these lines only work for the Shieldian quality. But then, no one in proper society really cares what those filthy common whelps or backwards outlandish provincials really think, say, or do.

"Dance, wot's that?"

-Minister of Culture

Dancing by itself is relatively uncommon, but dancing while playing an instrument is almost mandatory.

*Imitates Pete Townshend towards the end of Baba O'Riley*

"Comrade Yuki Pak? Ah, good, Marriage Directorate Haeju twelve-C-one-oh-seven. I'll see you on the sixteenth at Haeju Kim Twenty-Third of April Agriculture Collective, bring two yams, six pounds of maize, and a spade. Happy Progress, comrade fiancé!" [salute, turn, mount bicycle, hurry back to work]

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"Comrade Yuki Pak? Ah, good, Marriage Directorate Haeju twelve-C-one-oh-seven. I'll see you on the sixteenth at Haeju Kim Twenty-Third of April Agriculture Collective, bring two yams, six pounds of maize, and a spade. Happy Progress, comrade fiancé!" [salute, turn, mount bicycle, hurry back to work]

Don't the communists share wives? LOL!

I bet the commies just treat their people like domestic animals and select a mate for each one of them, expecting them to mate and rear children at gun point. Selective breeding. LOL!

Bump

Sigh heavily, slow clap, exit.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They come from a long way overseas,
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please.

So, I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please.


Undoubtedly they are smart and witty (like me) but are they cute, are they cuddly?

http://www.sinodefence.com/army/individual/type56_rifle762_1.jpg

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Was that all the nations of NS?

"Wanna marry me?" (a play on the love-at-first-sight thing that people in Temme absolutely adore.)

"I'm lost in [school subject], can you help me?" (Temme girls are married by 18, guys by 21.)

The people of Thrope are totally into werewolves so:
1. Have you been bitten yet?
2. Want to go for a moonlit stroll?
3.Forget about Monkshood and silver, you're my fatal weakness!
4. I Lycan you very much.(Lycanthrope means werewolf in case you didn't know.)