NationStates Jolt Archive

Allanean Arms Corporation Official Advertisement

Today, Allanean Arms, Inc. is happy to announce the dawn of a new day. We have, with the help of business partners in Der Angst, achieved the dream of sci-fi writers. The union of Man and Machine. Did you ever wish you could control your car, plane, bike better? Be stronger? Faster? See better? Now you can. Cybernetic uplinks to your vehicle, computer, stereo are now available from Allanean Arms (and undergoing testing with the Allanean air forces). Eye replacements and artificial limbs are also here, and we suggest you grab one.
And, finally, do you wish to become a true superhuman? Near-invulnerable, fast, untiring? Join the Allanean Arms "Project Kennet".. Get paid when the Allanean Corporation replaces your muscles with steel, neurons with optical cable, and your flesh with Kevlar. (DISCLAIMER: The process is experimental. By signing a contract with us, you agree that we are NOT responsible if you, say, die in the process. Those who complete the process are guaranteed with jobs in the Allanean Armed Forces or private security.

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Allanea, A facility in the north

Hiroshi was giggling. He liked the project. It was a bit... cruel, not too advanced (Well, not yet), but ok... And he made money out of it.

And he had to admit: The Allaneans were fairly interested in learning. Fascinating students.

"Please, stay quiet... Relax..."

A move, a drop, a scream.

"What did I say?"

It was still highly experimental... Well, that would change, soon. He just hoped the boys in the southern facility who did the uplinks to the machines would manage to keep up with him.

"Next."

Biotopia indipendently condemns your unethical testing and we are dubious of the motives. We are sending this information to the Universal Sapience Protection Commission.

Allanean Arms Inc. official response to the Biotopian Governemnt

There's nothing unethical in the testing. All the subjects are informed in the dangers and participating willingly.

aha, so you would believe the ends justify the means. I suspect that even hear the ends could not justify the means.

Since this is voluntary, the Feline government cannot protest. Howver, we worry and advise our friends in Allanea that this may spark an arms race if the cybernetic technology is used for military purposes.

Cybernetics has never been really popular except for prosthetics and the like in Feline, so we doubt that many will accept Allanean Arm's offer.

Official response by a foreign ministry spokesman
Daily press conference

"...So in short, we think the UN resolutions sucks and those who proposed it should be very, very ashamed of themselves."

The press begins to pick up their things and gets ready to leave when the spokesman raises his voice one more time.

"Oh, yes... one more thing before you leave. The Allaneans requested an official response to some testing programme of sorts."

A few journalists look up, others continue packing.

"Yes, well, our official stance is that we don't care. See you tomorrow."

The URHP would like to officially condemn this heinous act of testing human beings in an area that is so admittedly faulty and dangerous. For a nation to claim that it is liberal, in the definition of embracing human rights, Allanea is grossly breaking that boundary. Though it is voluntary, the URHP is still concerned that most do not fully recognize the dangers. Either way, the Allanean government should not think to allow its citizens to engage in such acts that have such high potential of harming them. The United Republics of the Hvittsted Pact demand a halt to this disgusting operation, until Allanean scientists have developed medicines or furthered the technology to lower the death rate of those tested to under 40%. If the Allanea government does not comply, it will only bode for worsening relations between our two states.

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"We like Allanea? Yes?"

"Not really."

"Der Angst?"

"Yes."

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Are you fools smoking something Knootian? What is the problem with MMI?

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Lady Senator Laudrina Frost, Princeps Senatus.

We must ask our Lietuveskan allies why they oppose this. If it is voluntary, and the risks are made clear, we see no problem with it.

Sometimes people have to die in the advancement of science. As long as they are volunteers, we do not worry.

From: HSC (Homo Superior Corporation), DA
To: Lietuveska
Subject: Your ridiculous message/ demands

"We have worked with this kind of technology for entire decades, and we are, as was explicitly stated, working with the Allaneans. Your entire message is ridiculous, laughable.

40% fatalities? We are way, way below that, we're... Better.

In any case, we cannot understand how you, or any other so called 'do- gooders' can so openly interfere (or demand to interfere) in the internal affairs of Allanea.

To put it simple: This is our project, this are Allanean people, and you should mind your own business.

Though we will have to admit that your statement, based on nothing but pure imagination, has certainly amused us. Now, if you would learn to consult sources to gain information before talking, you might even be able to discuss issues without making yourself look like a fool.

Disgusted,

~ The CEO

Official Response of Allanean Arms, Inc. to the governmentt of Lietuveska

As is the Allanean tradition, any entrant into Project Kennet has to sign a document detailing the risks of the operatin, proving that he a has read it. If it were not so, we would be bankrupt ages ago, ruined by thousands of lawsuits. Furthermore, Allaneans are free. Their lives belong to them. They have the right to risk them if they wish.

Kasparov was muttering under his breath angrily. Why had his Foreign Affairs Ministry jumped the gun like that, not reviewing information properly? And they had even offered demands, which he had certainly not cleared. Kasparov was inclined to agree with him, but he could not take such risks when it came to foreign affairs. He wrote a quick letter to the media, directing them to send it to governments involved.

To whom it may concern,

It appears that the Lietuv Ministry of Foreign Affairs has made an upsetting error this afternoon, and I must apologize for the mistake. I assure you action will be taken as a result.

I must say that it concerns me that Allanea would allow its citizens to engage in such an operation. It has always been my firm belief and understanding that a government existed to serve its citizens, and protect them from harm, disease, and death. I find it appalling that any government would actually allow its citizens to engage in such dangerous activities under its control. This recent action has still not boded well for Allanean-Lietuv relations, but I will not demand that Allanea change its course of action, taking point that it is an internal affair that is really none of my business.

Sincerely,
Boris Kasparov
Premier of the URHP

I would like to take this opportunity to remind everyone that the Allanean President Alexander Kazansky is still being held in Ali'Staan and we're still taking offers! Interested parties feel free to contact me any time. All offers will be kept strictly confidential.

Khaled Sudani
Lieutenant, Imperial Marshals
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[OC: sorry about the lack of posting concerning this, incidentally, but there have been people at my house nonstop for almost two days now. It should stop soon on account of my new policy of keeping people the hell out of here unless they call.]

Mr Sudani. I am reliably informed that the Vicereigne of Sentinel Two has previously tendered an offer that seems to have been rejected. However, as we apparently have a use for Mr Kazansky, we would like to increase this bid to a total of forty million, and, additionally, we will release all confidential information we currently hold on other Ardan nations to you.

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Lord de Vere, Director of the ISA.