NationStates Jolt Archive


Grammar, dang you!

Wormia
08-06-2004, 18:18
The Federated Stellar Republics of Wormia - Caesarian Intelligence Bureau

The scene within the Caesarian Intelligence Bureau was a quiet one. Typical evenings in the building were as such. Only when major incidents, typically international, were happening, was the room a flighty, bustling area.

But alas, the main ops room of the headquarters of Wormian intelligence was dark. Disparate light from a massive galactic map and a few satellite consoles was all that illuminated the room, as well as a few faces. The minimal look "ghastlified" their countenances.

James Clifford Benson glanced at his console. Above the sticker on it that read, "Galacticon Computers Inc. Recommends Microsoft Windows XP Professional," was the tiny clock seen at the bottom right hand corner of his screen. It read, in tiny, white, and non-anti-aliased lettering, "11:53 PM."

Seven minutes to go. His final moments of work seemed to slow. He wished something would pop up to pass the time more swiftly. And.... as if on cue... the screen flickered. An onboard computer program read simply on the screen, "Message Intercepted - Downloading... Please Wait."

In a few moments the message was displayed as having come from Country A*.

"for an upravoked atak, kuntr A declars war on kuntry b. we will be sneding lan dforcs within 24 hours you hva no chanse to surviv mke yor time."

The console operater almost barfed at the bad spelling... fortunately for him, there was UOGDN.

The Union of Grammar Defending Nations

The venerable organization was the defender of all linguistic rights, protecting letters and words from the terrible butchering of them by nations, groups, religions and people.

He forwarded the message.

OOC:

Now, it's gonna be a little shorter for me to explain this out of character.

Quite frankly, I don't care about the use of slang like, "dunno" or "gonna," or even the rare and steadfast punctuation, spelling or grammatical error. But, I can recall a nation whose entire declaration of war was almost verbatim to the example I have above.

Do national leaders talk like that? No. I'm sure you can find a typo in some UN Resolution, but the example above is like... a ... "hypertypo." There's so much typo that the gravity is going to cause the paragraph to collapse into a singularity whence it is ... done... burning language alltogether.

I will be nice to anyone on this game if they are nice to me, but, geez, these blobs of sh** some people go daring by calling a sentence ruin it all. PROPER GRAMMAR. IT EXISTS FOR A PURPOSE.

Is it that much to ask?

* For the sake of not hurting anyone's feelings, I used kuntry A... I mean... Countries A & B to carry my point.