NationStates Jolt Archive


Wombat News: Furious Satan gazumped on New Hell Development

Wombat News
14-05-2004, 11:56
Crimmond; Wombat News

The Devil put on an impressive display of satanic rage yesterday after losing out on a proposed New Hell development. Despite believing he had successfully concluded the multi-million pound deal, Satan found himself unexpectedly gazumped thanks to unscrupulous property developers and bent estate agents. (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=145275)

"For the love of all that's Holy, how can they get away with shit like this in this day and age?" raged the Lord of the Inferno. Indeed, Satan had an offer accepted on the larger, more versatile New Hell in June, only to find that a higher offer had subsequently been accepted from another emissary of evil. In addition, when he read a copy of the lease, he found that the estate agents had been "creative" in their description of the extent of the property and infernal facilities therein.

"It's just plain wrong. Hell's supposed to be crowded, but it's getting ridiculous. You try finding a decent-sized property with a lake of fire at today's prices," lamented the cloven-hoofed fallen angel. "I've pissed a few grand up the wall in solicitor’s fees and valuations, and now I have to start again from scratch. They're just scum, the lot of them."

The Crimmond-based estate agents dealing with the Horned One's prospective property declined to comment, but offered instead bass-heavy incessant maniacal laughter.

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Knootoss
14-05-2004, 13:55
heh... *giggles*
Draconis Nightcrawlis
14-05-2004, 14:34
Hehe, good as always :lol:
Wombat News
14-05-2004, 16:42
"And in late breaking news this evening .. "

This has been a Wombat News bump
Jeruselem
14-05-2004, 17:24
Crimmond, what a nice guy. Should move Hell there!
Five Civilized Nations
14-05-2004, 17:25
Hm... Would Crimmond mind if I help by nuking him? J/k...
Sketch
14-05-2004, 17:37
awesome
Crimmond
14-05-2004, 18:09
Thank you man, I really did need that laugh. My life just went from preety good to hell, if you will. My depression and normal weaird self is where I got the Dante's Inferno penitentiary idea from.