NationStates Jolt Archive

Can anyone read me? This is Commander Brask, head of the Greater Pern colonization efforts. We were preparing to land and colonize a great planet when our vessel was struck by space depbris and sent hurtling towards a barren desert. This is our only communication, a planetary short-range radio. We need your help! We are located roughly 9,000 kilometres north of the equator and seem to be near a mountain range. Please help us - the lives of 7 million colonists are at stake!

3 million years later, the message is recieved and disregarded as background noise by an AI unit.

OOC: Sorry, I'm Sol System only, but feel like being a smartass.

OOC: I doubt a planetary radio could reach that far anyway, it's designed for reaching orbitting ships.

OOC: It would help to know what system your in

OOC: ack! how can I tell?

This is from Pablitopia, My puppet.


OOC: Just say Sol, that way you can get help.

IC:

The 7th recon fleet begins fi9ring off small balls, which propell themselves across the sol system, searching for any life.

OOC: Say th Ghool system, I am rounding up my mining, and research ships out of there, they could pick up the signal.

OOC: kk, I'm in Sol then I guess.

IC: Brask was staring at the radio when lights were flashing through the sky. Some of the colonists were gobsmacked, expecting more space debris to come crashing down out to destroy them. Brask's co-pilot, Steve Brickman, realised that this was unlikely though. "Try again," he told Brask.
"Can anyone read me? This is an emergency!" Brask shouted down the radio.

H'mmm .... we're very sorry to hear of your plight (even though you did interrupt our Wednesday evening programming with the interference your message caused)

If we can help we will, but this is entirely dependant on the size of your species and your dietary requirements: clearly we are not willing to accomodate colonists who might prove a threat to ourselves and our environment.

Please describe your physical characteristics, with particular reference to body size and type of dentition; dietary preferences and requirements, and describe using a scale from 1 (zilch) to 10 (we think of little else) your tendency towards unproved acts of aggression.

We will pass this information to our Psychic Advisors who will screen it for truthfulness and accuracy and let you know within 2 hours from that point whether we are decided to assist in your rescue or whether we shall instead have to leave your future in the hands of fate.

P.S. if you happen to be less than 6" earth height and don't include chicken in your menus, you're off to a head start.

Intel informs us that from the colonists surviving the crash the average hight is 5 foot 6 inches. The colonists are almost all vegetarian in case a lack of animal variety inhabited the planet. The colonists of Greater Pern do not attack unless their existance is threatened, which it rarely is (this is the first time for the whole movement) so on your scale it would be 3. The colonists only need a temporary home whilst we can dig a canal through the desert to supply us with water.

The Titanus can provide you with whatever you need while your colonists get on their feet. Just get back in touch with us as to your necessary supplies and we can move in to assist post-haste.

-Arthur Guilder
Imperial Governor of the Titanus Starbase

Then we shall immediately send our jet-aided Task Flight to your aid: they will bring with them the components for our Matter Dis-& Re-Assembler Transporter in order that once it is set up, all your company can be transported to The Free Lands Of Interested Chickens, where you will be given visas valid for a 6 month stay in our nation plus all the help our engineering experts can provide for your channel through the desert.

Please ensure all your people realise that as Chickens, we are a small species, and warn them to MIND WHERE THEY PUT THEIR FEET.

p.s . do you eat worms? If so, our chefs will prepare a Welcome Feast of worm with chicory in time for your arrival.

Unless of course, you feel going with The Titanus would be more suitable to you.

We would feel safer with The Titanus, we feel that a squashed chicken could cause your planet to turn against us and cause the mission to be a failure.

ooc: as well as the fact that the interested chickens are no where near old enough for space travel.

A message bounces back to the Recon Ship from a small probe.
It bleeps and displas co-ordinates on a screen infront of Joey Kreazack, who informs the Captain.
Go
He screams, and the entire vessel fades into Black Hole Travel.
A black hole appears abbout 5 miles away from the atmosphere of the planet, and from it emreges a fleet of Recon vessels, and a transport ship.
It picks up speed and breaches the atmosphere of the un-inhabited planet, searching for the exact loaction fo the stranded peoples.

ooc: as well as the fact that the interested chickens are no where near old enough for space travel.


Point 1 ... we don't do space travel, why did you think we did? We use jet packs to assist our flights as we're sorta slow otherwise, and we're very technologically advanced so we do have a lot of input into space programmes for species which need a bit of help in that direction - we were of the impression the colonists had landed in a desert on our own world??????????? If not, how the XXXX did their planet bound radio message reach us?

Point 2 ... supposing we did want to travel space, why ain't we old enough?
Is there a sticky where we can find out that sort of stuff?

Point 3 ... Derieties, we think you're just an old meanie anyway. :-pppp

OOC: Eeek! My colonists are breeding like rabbits instead of worrying about their health! 2 million new pernese people in 2 days?!

IC:

Brask looked around him. People were starting to dig holes in the sand, as shelter and as a home. Fate is cruel, Brask thought to himself whilst waiting for a reply to the telegram he wired to The Titanus. It would not be long before these people started dying off. He switched the radio to all frequencies. "Does anyone have a furnace we can use to make glass out of the sand with? I have an idea for a temporary solution to our water problems," he said, fingers crossed. When he was a child he had won a science fair by focussing the sun's rays to separate hydrogen and oxygen from air, and then fuse them.

"I guess that's our cue." Arthur said with a wry grin. "I'm just glad we get to help some poor colonists for a change, rather than sit here monitoring transmissions between Earth and the rest of the Sol System." He sighed, then called out to the station's A.I. "Diom."

Yes Governor?

"Is the Charybdis ready to depart?"

Yes sir. The rest of the convoy is ready as well.

"Good, good," Arthur said with a nod, "Put me through to Captain Reyburn."

Yes sir.

"Thank you Diom." Captain Reyburn's holographic avatar swirled into form on the other side of Arthur's desk. He saluted smartly (a fist placed near the heart coupled with a bow), and Arthur saluted in return. "Captain, your men are ready to leave?"

"Yes Governor."

"Good, good. Remember captain, this is a diplomatic mission to rescue some stray colonists. Be careful not to insult them."

Reyburn nodded, "Of course sir, I will act with the epitome of chivalry. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some colonists to save."

The Intari War Cruiser Charybdis slowly pulled away from the Titanus Starbase, its sleek blue design cutting through space quickly and easily. Accompanying the Charybdis were 30 Royal Supertankers and 50 other cargo vessels, all loaded with supplies, building equipment, and building materials. After clearing the Martian sphere of influence, the makeshift fleet phased into another dimensional plane, moving at an even quicker speed for the fallen colonists.

_______________________________



The ships are on their way and should arrive within 2 hours. Your men and women may rest, the Eurydian Imperial Guard is here to protect you and help you with whatever you need. just tell them what you need done, and it shall be so.

-Arthur Guilder

OOC: Eeek! My colonists are breeding like rabbits instead of worrying about their health! 2 million new pernese people in 2 days?!

ooc: Common accepted IRL to NS time conversion is 1 IRL day= 1 NS year.