Wombat News
23-02-2004, 17:49
Australian Marsupials; Wombat News
Wombat News spokeswoman Sheila Dinkidi vehemently denied claims earlier today that the world's most famous news broadcaster had been engaging in underhanded and subliminal messaging practices. (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=2773591&highlight=#2773591) "The superlative quality of Wombat News is all we need," Dinkidi said, before quietly adding, "watching Wombat News makes you smarter".
A report published by the Advertising Standards Society (ASS) early this month named Wombat News among a handful of well-known global corporations suspected of using subliminal messaging to increase awareness and sales of their products. Ms. Dinkidi, sporting a "Pink Bunny Cola Causes Cancer" t-shirt, denied this claim.
"Subliminal messaging - watch Wombat News - is illegal throughout most of the world, and Wombat News strictly adheres to those laws," she stated, before quickly holding up a picture of the Wombat News logo, and then immediately hiding it behind her podium.
Responding to the claim that Wombat News has doctored images broadcast by them to include hidden silhouettes of wombats and other marsupials, Dinkidi stated "that's just crazy talk", and "maybe [the ASS] is going crazy from not watching enough Wombat News, which can happen".
She denied that there was any link to this claim and Wombat News’ recently opened "Image Doctoring Division", or their exclusive licensing of Adobe Photoshop 8.0, a popular image editing application.
Dinkidi reminded the press that according to the latest Wombat News research, in a blindfold test, Machiavelli would have chosen Wombat News over CNN.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – NOT IN ANY WAY – WATCH WOMBAT NEWS - TRYING TO INFLUENCE YOUR VIEWING CHOICES
Wombat News spokeswoman Sheila Dinkidi vehemently denied claims earlier today that the world's most famous news broadcaster had been engaging in underhanded and subliminal messaging practices. (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=2773591&highlight=#2773591) "The superlative quality of Wombat News is all we need," Dinkidi said, before quietly adding, "watching Wombat News makes you smarter".
A report published by the Advertising Standards Society (ASS) early this month named Wombat News among a handful of well-known global corporations suspected of using subliminal messaging to increase awareness and sales of their products. Ms. Dinkidi, sporting a "Pink Bunny Cola Causes Cancer" t-shirt, denied this claim.
"Subliminal messaging - watch Wombat News - is illegal throughout most of the world, and Wombat News strictly adheres to those laws," she stated, before quickly holding up a picture of the Wombat News logo, and then immediately hiding it behind her podium.
Responding to the claim that Wombat News has doctored images broadcast by them to include hidden silhouettes of wombats and other marsupials, Dinkidi stated "that's just crazy talk", and "maybe [the ASS] is going crazy from not watching enough Wombat News, which can happen".
She denied that there was any link to this claim and Wombat News’ recently opened "Image Doctoring Division", or their exclusive licensing of Adobe Photoshop 8.0, a popular image editing application.
Dinkidi reminded the press that according to the latest Wombat News research, in a blindfold test, Machiavelli would have chosen Wombat News over CNN.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – NOT IN ANY WAY – WATCH WOMBAT NEWS - TRYING TO INFLUENCE YOUR VIEWING CHOICES