Biggus Inc
08-02-2004, 18:37
The Duck-Duck-Goose Congressional System. It is the general consensus of the public that the current method of congressional dealings is boring and unappealing to the average 1st grader. By using the DDGCS, we could "jazz" up congressional meetings and put the "Con" back in congress.
The DDGCS is very simple. Congress[wo]men will hold week long sessions every other week, with special sessions per request of the president. During a session, no one is allowed to enter or leave the congressional chambers without medicinal reasons.
The DDGCS process is simple, yet elegant in design. To begin, all of the members of the congress sit in a circle, put white wigs on their heads and put on velcro robes, and draw a name from a hat to determine who goes first. The chosen member leaves their place in the circle, and begins walking around the circle, making tapping motions towards the seated members and declaring them Ducks. This may continue indefinitely, as long as the motions and the declarations continue.
At any given moment, the chosen member may tap another member on the head and shout "Goose!". Then the chase begins. The chosen member (the first one) now runs around the circle, shouting his/her propsition while doing so. They are allowed 3 laps to do so. The "Goose" has two choices:
a.) If they oppose the orating member (OM) on any point, they (Goose) must chase the member and tag them (OM) before they reach the open seat. If tagged, the OM must stop talking, and restart the process.
b.) Should the "Goose" agree with the OM, the Goose must shout "No, I don't think I'm bald!" then grab the hand of the OM and act as a shield while they frolic around the circle.
Upon hearing the call of the non-bald Goose, three opposing member may throw off their wigs and shout "But we're not insane in the membrane! Spicy Tamalé! Spicy Tamalé!" The three are decided by whomever removes their wigs first, as determined by the Sitters.
After the opposers have called out "Spicy Tamalé, the OM and the Goose may choose an additional 2 members to help protect the OM, who is now refered to as Mother Goose.
In order to successfully stop the motion from passing, the opposers must attatch their wigs to the velcro robe of Mother Goose before the goose group can make 5 laps around the circle while holding hands. Should the Goose Group make it, their initiative is passed. If not, then the initiative is stopped.
The only thing that the geese may to to protect mother goose is to "Take a wig" for him/her. Each goose may absorb 2 wigs before leaving.
The opposers may borrow the wigs of other members opposed to the initiative to aid their cause.
Should neither group be able to find enough supporters, that group loses by default.
That's the DDGCS. So, what do you think?
The DDGCS is very simple. Congress[wo]men will hold week long sessions every other week, with special sessions per request of the president. During a session, no one is allowed to enter or leave the congressional chambers without medicinal reasons.
The DDGCS process is simple, yet elegant in design. To begin, all of the members of the congress sit in a circle, put white wigs on their heads and put on velcro robes, and draw a name from a hat to determine who goes first. The chosen member leaves their place in the circle, and begins walking around the circle, making tapping motions towards the seated members and declaring them Ducks. This may continue indefinitely, as long as the motions and the declarations continue.
At any given moment, the chosen member may tap another member on the head and shout "Goose!". Then the chase begins. The chosen member (the first one) now runs around the circle, shouting his/her propsition while doing so. They are allowed 3 laps to do so. The "Goose" has two choices:
a.) If they oppose the orating member (OM) on any point, they (Goose) must chase the member and tag them (OM) before they reach the open seat. If tagged, the OM must stop talking, and restart the process.
b.) Should the "Goose" agree with the OM, the Goose must shout "No, I don't think I'm bald!" then grab the hand of the OM and act as a shield while they frolic around the circle.
Upon hearing the call of the non-bald Goose, three opposing member may throw off their wigs and shout "But we're not insane in the membrane! Spicy Tamalé! Spicy Tamalé!" The three are decided by whomever removes their wigs first, as determined by the Sitters.
After the opposers have called out "Spicy Tamalé, the OM and the Goose may choose an additional 2 members to help protect the OM, who is now refered to as Mother Goose.
In order to successfully stop the motion from passing, the opposers must attatch their wigs to the velcro robe of Mother Goose before the goose group can make 5 laps around the circle while holding hands. Should the Goose Group make it, their initiative is passed. If not, then the initiative is stopped.
The only thing that the geese may to to protect mother goose is to "Take a wig" for him/her. Each goose may absorb 2 wigs before leaving.
The opposers may borrow the wigs of other members opposed to the initiative to aid their cause.
Should neither group be able to find enough supporters, that group loses by default.
That's the DDGCS. So, what do you think?