NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: I do intend to RP this in each nation that books the show and will tailor the performance to your particular cultural norms. If you want the elephants to strut to "Dude looks like a Lady" because you can't enough Aerosmith, here's your chance! I draw the line at Celine Dion, though....

By order of Her Most Royal Majesty Queen Celeste, Lady of the Mahout, Benefactress of the Arts, Defender of the People:

The Holy Empire of Hatchibombitar is proud to announce the inaugural tour of the “Royal Mahouts Revue”. Clad only in a traditional linen diaper, and wielding only a ceremonial ankhus, these talented young men and women will lead a troupe of Palavian Pachyderms through the music and choreography that has delighted and thrilled Hatchibombitarian audiences for generations.

Reviewers have described this show as “Up With People meets the National Geographic Channel” and have waxed lyrically over the raw earthiness of such show stopping numbers as “Oops, I Did it Again” featuring the sensual gyrations of Momba, the matriarch of our pachyderm performers. Familiar favorites have a storied place in the show, including the famous pachyderm conga line to the infectious beat of “The Banana Boat Song”. Day-Oh Indeed!

New for 2004 is our stirring tribute to Milli Vanilli. “Girl, You Know it’s True” there won’t be a dry eye in the house when those dreadlocked elephants get to dancing! Bring the children to see BonBon the baby pachyderm and her hilarious antics to the tune of “The Good Ship Lollipop”. And what Revue would be complete without a circle of elephants, trunk to tail, swaying gently as the mahouts stand atop their mighty backs singing “Kumbaya”?

This show is offered free of charge to the world, in hopes that music, dance, and all the free manure you can carry can bring us all a little closer together. Worldwide bookings are now being accepted through the office of Cultural Minister James Osmond. Reservations may also be made via this thread.


Edit: Title change and OOC explanation added

Don't forget all you nations at war, that this show makes a great pick-me-up for soldiers stationed far from home! Think USO, and Bob Hope with a trunk.

To: Her Most Royal Majesty Queen Celeste
From: Foreign Relations and Libation Council of Guinness Extra Cold

When his bubbly Highness, Dominar Oliver McPhibbish heard that your Royal Mahout Revue was touring again, he screamed like a small female child, over and over again.

He then reminded us about how he loved their fur and multiple humps. We reminded him those were camels and that we were talking about elephants. He then had one of our team killed in a fit of rage and made us promise that never to mention this incident on pain of death.

We in Guinness Extra Cold welcome your wonderful traveling show and will provide, with permission, an accompanying GEC representative and sample truck so that other nations can enjoy a good trunk while drunk!

*Office of the President, Wolfish*

"SCOTT!," President Todler yelled to his Chief of Staff, "SCOTT - GET IN HERE."

(Panting), "Yes Mr. President - what do you need?"

"I need you to get on the phone and make sure that show is booked" -thrusting a brochure towards the Chief of Staff - "then find my fake nose and glasses. I have a reputation after all."

"Yes Mr. President...right away," he said with a straight face, but slight eye-roll.

Bump to promote the addition of free booze to the show, courtesy of the fine distilleries of Guinness Extra Cold.

Guinness Extra Cold believes that this an excellent opportunity for nations to decrease civil unrest and reaffirm local goverment through mass entertainment of the populace.

Just added: Midnight show, with Ella the Elephant doing her provocative bump and grind...