NationStates Jolt Archive

*Commercials End*

Amy: "Hello to all you people out there, your on K-Chat, Vice City's 1# rated Talk Radio Show and now the only International Radio Program in the whole wide world! Today's topic is about the ruler of Menelmacar, Lady Siri, the reason we are talking about her is because of the fact that for many years while she has ruled most of the US and the state of Florida with her Menelmacar Empire Vice City has managed to remain independant, but no one is sure how or why, my best friend Jenny thinks that Tommy Vercetti is screwing Siri to keep her out but I doubt it, I mean I dated him for three whole days so I know what kind of girl he likes. So to help us figure it out we have a special guest, he was the Republican Representative for Vice City in the Senate until the US fell apart and he now heads what remains of Vice City's City Government, here is is, Mayor Alex Shrub!"

*pants for breath*

Alex: "Hello Amy it's great to be here."

*more panting*

Alex: "Amy?"

*takes deep breath*

Amy: "I'm fine now, So Mayor my first question for you is this, why hasn't Menelmacar attacked Vice City and taken over?"

Alex: "That's the problem with Vice City today, when I was a Senator no one was even aware that Menelmacar existed but now that they have temporarily disrupted the US Government everyone is worried about an attack. You don't need to worry about a thing Amy."

Amy: "Why?"

Alex: "Why what?"

Amy: "So why not worry?"

Alex: "Because we pay her bribes... I mean we had a nice cup of tea a few years ago and I was able to talk her out of blowing the city up with nuclear weapons.

Amy: "Oh, well if that is all it took then why is everyone so worked up about an attack?"

Alex: "It's the Liberal Elite who want to make everyone afraid of everyone else so they can take over and offer the city up to the highest bidder so they can retire as multi-billionaires."

Amy: "But who ARE the Liberal Elite, you banned the Democratic Party from Vice City five years ago."

Alex: "That my dear is a difficult question.... But I think I'll have an answer after a commercial break."

Amy: "Oh right it is about time for one, well we will take a quick commercial break and when we come back we will see if Alex has a good answer."


DJ Amy Sheckenhausen
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:c3POdl4oDgsJ:viceland.free.fr/Nouveau%2520dossier/mercedes1.jpg
The Free Land of K-Chat
Sponsored by: Giggle Cream, Dunkin’ Donuts, Pitbomb, BJ’s Used Autos, InterGlobal Films, Inc., Ammu-Nation, and the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund

*Commercials End*

Amy: "Hello and welcome back to K-Chat, if your just tuning in we are talking about the reasons why Menelmacar hasn't taken Vice City over yet, even though the city is in Southern Florida. Our Mayor Alex Shrub!"

Alex: "Thanks Amy it is always a pleasure to talk about the many issues of Vice City."

Amy: "So do you have an answer to the question I asked before the break?"

Alex: "Sure I do... I am going to talk for a long time about a subject not in anyway related and pretty soon people will forget all about it. I will remind people that I have a great haircut and that under my leadership Vice City has had on average 18% better weather than before and that the crime rate only grows if you don't turn the graph upside down. Turn it upside down and it has halved. Halved! Under me, Alex Shrub. Vote Shrub for Mayor next election and you will have a friendly face in office, a person you can trust, a local man who likes golf, and laughing and photo-opportunities at your store or place of business."

Amy: "You have failed to answer to the question."

Alex: "I'm a politician, that’s my job."

Amy: mutters: *"this guy is such a dick."*

Alex: "What was that?"

Amy: "Nothing! Well with Vice City in fear of an attack by Menelmacar and over half the city under the control of the Tommy Vercetti Crime Family what is it that you are going to do to bring order to Vice City, and how will we do this with an under funded and demoralized police force?"

Alex: "That is also a difficult question but as you know the city government has gone bankrupt due to the fact that US no longer exists and the military base and all military units turned traitor and joined the Tommy Vercetti Crime Family and the police are low on weapon ammo and supplies, I am afraid that we are doing everything we can to keep order on the eastern part of the city, I am afraid that until more help comes the western part will remain under the rule of the Crime Family."

Amy: "Well I guess your right about that, though my friend Kristy thinks that if the elves just restored the US government to power everything will fix itself and she knows more about these things than I do so..."

Alex: "What’s your next question?"

Amy: "Well we need to take a commercial break, then take some phone calls from our listeners. Your on K-Chat so don't go away."


DJ Amy Sheckenhausen
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:c3POdl4oDgsJ:viceland.free.fr/Nouveau%2520dossier/mercedes1.jpg
The Free Land of K-Chat
Sponsored by: Giggle Cream, Dunkin’ Donuts, Pitbomb, BJ’s Used Autos, InterGlobal Films, Inc., Ammu-Nation, and the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund

OOC: Sorry I haven't posted in awhile I have had forum troubles

*Commercials End*

Amy: "Hello and your back on K-Chat with me, DJ Amy Sheckenhausen, the best DJ in Vice City. So Lets take a few phone calls caller on line one your through to K-Chat, what is your name?"

Claud: "Hello, this is Claud Vendi Vendish, I am just vacationing here after my month long work in Saudi Arabia on the oil rigs."

Amy: "Do you have a question of Alex Shrub?"

Claud: "Yes, when is Vice City going to make Starfish Island open to the tourists?"

Alex: "Well as Starfish Island is the neutral zone for the Vercetti Crime Family and the Official City Government of Vice City it will remain closed to the general public at this time."

Claud: "Ok."

Amy: "My god this show is so boring today."

Alex: "What?"

Amy: "Nothing lets take another caller, caller on line two your through to K-Chat, what is your name?"

Ronald: "Hi Amy my name is... my name is... *fuzzy echo: "Hey Nancy what is my name?"* My name is Ronald Regan, the former President of the USA."

Amy: "Oh My God! Hello Ronald! This is like so cool! So Mr. Regan did you have a question."

Ronald: "My question is... I wrote it down here so I wouldn't forget it, ah it is Will Vice City eventually allow itself to be taken by another nation to bring security and a word I can't read to Vice City? and what is my name agian?"

Alex: "Well for now Vice City will function as an independent city-state for the moment but if it is needed I will consider allowing the city to be absorbed by another HUMAN nation."

Ronald: "What are you yapping your gums about?"

Amy: "Nevermind."

Ronald: "Nancy I wet myself agian!"

Amy: "That is so gross well anyway time for another commercial break and then we will wrap the show up, your on K-Chat so don't go away."


DJ Amy Sheckenhausen
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:c3POdl4oDgsJ:viceland.free.fr/Nouveau%2520dossier/mercedes1.jpg
The Free Land of K-Chat
Sponsored by: Giggle Cream, Dunkin’ Donuts, Pitbomb, BJ’s Used Autos, InterGlobal Films, Inc., Ammu-Nation, and the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund

*Comercials End*

Amy: "Hi your back on K-Chat with me, Amy Sheckenhausen, so Alex now that we have heard from the people of Vice City and we have an idea why the city is going to hell in a hand basket why don't you just tell us what your going to do next?"

Alex: "Well once I leave the K-Chat studios I plan to go to my mansion on Starfish Island, pick up a hottie, screw her in my golden bed, and have a smoke on an imported cuban cigar."

Amy: "No, no, no, not about that, about what your going to do for Vice City?"

Alex: "Well I already told everyone that plans are in motion but it isn't wise to spill the beans just yet."

Amy: "Oh, well, ok."

Amy: "Well anyways most of the show has been kinda slow and I apologise for that and in our next show I promise to find a guest who is a rabble rouser. I'm Amy Sheckenhausen and this is K-Chat."


DJ Amy Sheckenhausen
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:c3POdl4oDgsJ:viceland.free.fr/Nouveau%2520dossier/mercedes1.jpg
The Free Land of K-Chat
Sponsored by: Giggle Cream, Dunkin’ Donuts, Pitbomb, BJ’s Used Autos, InterGlobal Films, Inc., Ammu-Nation, and the Pastor Richards Salvation Statue Fund