NationStates Jolt Archive

Semi-OOC:CHILLS! THRILLS! INSANELY RAMBUNCTIOUS LAUGHTER! All of these and more in the long-awaited sequel to "Evil Freebodnik Mad Scientist Threatens World!". All in an action-packed 2 disc DVD set, including behind the scenes looks at 'the making of Evil Freebodnik Mad Scientist Threatens World!'

IC:
The House of Myshikel, Sub- Sub- Sub- Sub- Sub-Basement

Applejohn grins goofily as he toys with the OMGUBERMAP-9000 system. "Well, here's an island... volcanic... dormant... lots of igneous rock... only problem is that it looks kinda like a reclining dame or something instead of the usual skull or evil insignia. Will that work?"

Calling out from the other room, Myshikel said, "Oh yes, that's perfectly all-right! Preparations have already been made and we'll be ready to trigger self-destruct at any time now. By the way, Applejohn, do you suppose 'Isla de Sinistra' would be a good name for it? Or perhaps 'Evil Island', though that may be somewhat cliché..."

"Well," Applejohn calls out from the lair, "given its proportions, I'd think 'Las Gambas Largas' if you want to keep up the Spanish flair... she doesn't look like she's of any good repute, so if we want to be crass, we can always go with something that has 'pu...'"

Private Applejohn, late of the Triumvirate of Yut Combined Services Mobile Infantry squad sent to save some little hippy tied to Myshikel's last fiendish plot, stops humming the theme 'Mission: Impossible' and thinks.

He rolls around the phrase 'self-destruct' in his head. He thinks of its sounds; how it is written in print and cursive, English and Arabic; how it simply pings off the teeth with its sibilant esses and tapping tees. Especially the end 'uckt' sound. He lets it wander about in his head.

Uckt... uckt... self-destruckt... f... He gulps. Uckt.

"Um, any name you think is absolutely appropriate, Doctor." Applejohn grins, speaks a little too quickly, and just barely avoids having his voice crack. "Please tell me the self-destruct thing comes after we pick a name... if not, then I say we adjourn and pick it up on the ride there."

"Excellent idea," called Myshikel from another place, his voice echoing down through the metal halls and labyrinthine corridors of Myshikel's sub-sub-sub-sub-sub basement. "Pick up whatever you like, pack what clothing you need, and we'll be off in the next fifteen minutes! NINA!! Fetch me your lingerie."

"Yes, Doctor, should I fetch yours as well?"

"Bah, well, whatever you like. MURRRRRRRT!"

"Yesh, mawshter?!"

"Can you run down to the nearest bake shop and pick up a few crumpets? We'll need a little food on the way there - by the way, Applejohn, how far is our new evil abode from Freebodnik V?"

The sounds of his minion, clutching his helmet with the little point in it, running off the front porch of the house and off to the nearest quaint little Freebodnik bakery.

Applejohn looks over to his bulky assault armor so recently doffed. "Well, I guess that classifies as 'my things.'" Stepping over to it, he begins to suit back up. "Distance is about five hundred kilometers. Not very far, but I don't think that annoying little hippie can walk on water either, so it doesn't matter."

Not too far away, Eulalia was strapping a floatation vest onto herself, and a pair of Professor Leela Asumunssen 295's custom rocket-propelled Water-Boots onto her feet. Looking up to the raven-haired professor, she called out in a slightly hesitant voice:

"Dr. Asmunssen? Are you sure that these are safe?"

"My dear, that's why I'm testing them," laughed Dr. Asmunssen.

Eulalia gulped and stared at the funny wide skids with the rocket engines at the back, and took the two control levers into her hands. They had red buttons on the ends.

"Professor, what I meant was, are you sure that these won't explode or anything?"

"Oh, of course I am," said Asmunssen, pointing at her still-smoking black hair and partially-burnt lab coat, "I always make sure to test it out on myself before giving it to other people to try."

Eulalia gulped anyways. Freebodnik V had a healthy share of mad scientists, but only a handful of them, like Dr. Myshikel who had strapped her to the end of that gigantic steel phallus a few hours ago, were actually mean or grouchy. Most were simply content to build odd contraptions and blow their houses up (which is, in fact, precisely what Dr. Myshikel did), but were usually satisfied at that and did not entertain delusions of world domination.

An explosion from a few kilometres away attracted her attention, and she looked up, to see a massive explosion curl up from where Dr. Myshikel's house had been, and a large solar-powered helicopter rise from it, riding upon the shockwave in a dizzy, drunken fashion. Knowing what she had to do, Eulalia set her face and pressed the buttons, zooming off over the water while precariously trying to keep her balance.

"WhooOOOOOOaAAAAA!"

**

The quick stumble and tumble into the helicopter had unceremoniously dumped Nina into Applejohn's mechanical, waldo-controlled lap, and Murt came shortly thereafter. Dr. Myshikel himself had landed rather smoothly in the pilot's seat. The helicopter rose swiftly from the massive, melodramatic explosion, with the 'Acme Evil-O-Matic Mobile-Fold-Up-Lair in tow beneath. Out of the corner of her eye, Nina stared out of the bubble window and noticed something small coming up quickly behind them, trailing little white ripples in the water.

"Hey! What's that?" she said, black PVC catsuit creaking.