NationStates Jolt Archive

With a flash of blue the GDS Bumblebee spat out of Sub-Space, it 's crew already preparing it for the next jump. As the pilot and engineers hurry around, the owner of the yaht, a Lord Hughten Ween III, relaxes in his cabin.

"Finally, we're almost there. I haven't visited my estate on Epsilon Pegasi in ages. Steward, how long till we jump again?"

"I'll check, sir."

"Bring back a drink!"

The steward hurries out, leaving Ween to himself.

Suddenly, an alarm begins to blare throughout the ship. Ween doesn't even bother to react, leaving that to the paid help. However, when the ship begins to jerk even he has to take notice.

"Captain, what's going on?"

"There's been an engine failure, sir. We've lost the Sub-Space motivators, as well as the starboard thursters. There's a planet nearby and we're going to try for a landing."

"Well, hurry it up. And where's that steward with my drink?"

Before the captain can release his planned string of swears at the idiot who is his boss the ship is rocked by yet another explosion.

"There goes the last thruster. All hands brace for impact!"

"Well, who's going to strap me in?"

The Captain, though he despises the man, quickly busies himself to tying down the man who signs his pay checks. He then proceeds to strap himself in as the ship plumits toward the surface of the plantet

OOC:

Lord Hughten Ween III is one of the richest men in Klonor. Unfortunately, he's also an idiot, having gotten his riches from his parents. His entire life has been spent in complete luxury, being pampered and spoiled. I doubt he can even tie his shoes by himself. However, he's about to have a bit of a bump in his life

In orbit of Mirfak III, a Xanthalian monitoring station's crew notes the falling ship.
"Configuration?"
"Private yaht. Registered as originating from Klonor."
"Klonor? What's the damn thing doing here?"
"Unknown Sir, but it's going down."
"Can we catch it?"
"Negative. It's out of range. Shall I dispatch a recovery crew?"
"No. Our job is to monitor traffic on and off that planet. We're not a rescue squad. Note it in the log, if it's someone important I'm sure the Klonor government will go find it themselves. If not, the convicts will have a new toy."
"Understood."

On the surface:
"Jimmy" (no one knows his real name) is one of the 'voluntary' exiles of Mirfak III. He didn't want to work and wouldn't leave the country, so he had been sent here in accordance with Xanthalian law five years ago. You have to be tough to live on Mirfak III, but it isn't usually that bad. Some days are more interesting than others.
He sits on his porch in the city of Veneration. Looking into the sky, he sees what appears to be a fireball racing through the sky towards him. He raises an eyebrow (nothing surprises him anymore) and moves behind a wall for shelter.

With one final BOOM the the GDS Bumblebee slams into the surface, the shriek of torn metal filling the air. The captain, only half strapped into his chair, is thrown around, slamming into walls and the ceiling, finally lying still rolled against the wall.

Hughteen Ween III slowly got up, calling out for his servants and a new change of clothing.

"Where the hell is everybody? Captain, I demand you get up this instant! Either you get this ship moving again or you are fired!"

Unfortunately, his job is the least of the captains worries.

Finally, with a gasp of exasperation and a brief statement that "everybody's fired", Ween steps to the doors of the ship and walks out (burduned with much money and jewels, of course).

"Hello? Is anybody out there?"

A crowd gathers around the ship, which has completely obliterated the town tavern. Several unsavory-looking characters (men and women) step forward seeing the valuables. One of them, a bulky man of middle age, speaks in a gruff voice. "Give us the jewels."

"Excuse me? Ah, you must be the bellhop. Well, take my things to the nearest hotel, and have a room made for me. Also, have my ship made ready for launch. I need to be at my estates quite soon."

He tosses the lugage that had fallen out of the torn cargo bay at the man, then proceeds to look around, not even bothering to glance at the man again.

The man grabs Hughteen roughly by the collar and snarls at him. "Listen here, moron; take the valuables out of your pockets and hand them to me. Now!"

"Unhand me you brute, or I'll have you fired! Do you have any idea who I am? I'm Lord Hughten Ween III!"

Unfortunately, the assailant didn't seem to care as he backhanded him to the ground

The man removes the Lord's valuables none too gently, then tosses some of it to his cronies before kicking Hughten hard in the side and walking off with his gang in tow. Jimmy steps from behind his wall and walks slowly to Hughten, who he offers a hand up.

"Ah, good man. I'll make sure your manager here's of this. That other one, (spitting sound), I'll get him fired! Worst bellhop I've ever had. Now, where's my groundcar?"

He then sits down to wait for his limo that will be there at any second :roll:

Jimmy raises his eyebrow. This is a new one...
"Um... Excuse me Sir, but I don't have a manager. Neither does he. You can't get an unemployed person fired, and if you mess with people on this planet you'll get your face bashed in. Do you even know where you are?"

He looks around with a politely interested expression on his face

"Does it matter? It's not my etstae on Epsilon Pegasi, nor my mansion in Deneb. I'd say we're somewhere in Regulus. Probably in that dreadful Elf colony. You know, I heard they don't even have a port for my luxury yaht."

As he looks back at his crashed ship

"Eh, I'll just buy a new one. Where's the nearest KSS office?"

"This is Mirfak III. Do you know it?"

"Is that one of those new prefab-planets? They're supposed to be popping up like....what do you call them?..... flies all over the Empire"

"You're in Xanthal. Well, technically anyway. This is the planet where Xanthal exiles all of its criminals that cannot be or refuse to be rehabilitated. Not an easy planet to get off of, even for someone who doesn't belong here."

Ween ponders this for a few minutes, then responds

"Am on that new hidden camera show? I've seen it! Am I on TV right now? That would be so great! If I'm going to be the next big TV star I'll need a nice room to freshen up. Where's my hotel?"

Jimmy laughs. This man was the stupidest person he'd ever met. He was tempted to just leave him, but he'd feel guilty knowing the next person Hughten talked to would probably kill him. Best to just try getting him off this planet before he got in any more trouble. "Um... Yes, this is a hidden-camera show. I'll take you to your hotel." He drags Hughten along with him towards a hovercar rental station. Why the hell am I doing this? I should just shoot him and be done with it.

(Yes, you should. It'd save everybody a lot of grief)

IC:

"Ah, very good. I'd like to be well dressed for my first appearence. You know, I've had many guest appearances on talk and news shows, but never a show of such high quality as the modern reality shows (Like I said, he's an idiot). What's your role here, and who do we vote off first?"

"It's secret until we get to Mordor." He says, not bothering to make any sense. He rents a hovercar and gets in, beckoning Hughten to sit beside him. The car is ramshackle and put together with spare parts, but functional.

"What? Where's my limo? Oh, I get it, we're ruffing it. Gotta survive the harshness. Very well, I can stand the car until we get to the hotel."

He gets in, trying to touch as little of the car's interior as possible.

"Right... The hotel." He steps on the gas and the car races out of town and across the desert.

Ween glances around the car's interior

"You know, I don't see how you people can survive this. It's so barbarous! Only 4 speakers for the radio! It's embarissing. I do hope they'll have something more civilized at the hotel. When are we going to arrive?"

Jimmy starts swerving the car from side to side violently, taking sadistic pleasure in Ween's distress.

"You, sir, have just lost your tip!"

"Boo hoo." He straightens the car's path. The vehicle races towards a city on the horizon.

"So, When do we vote off the first member? Or do we have to compete in our tasks firsts? And I'll expect a meal as soon as we get to the hotel. Boy, it is hot in here."

He then takes a few 100 floren bills out of his pockest and begins to fan himself with them, dropping a few and not even bothering to pick them up

"Shut up. Please." The car enters the city and Jimmy gets out in front of the rental station there. "Damn, it's closed. We'll need to spend the night. This way." He heads off, only half caring if Hughten follows him or not.

"Oh, this is most exhilirating. Where's the valet? How can we go slumming without a valet?"

As a random man walks past Ween welcomes him

"Ah, there you are. Please, keep it out of the sun"

he then hands over the keys which he had pilferred from his escorts pockets (from a young age he'd learned to cheat to get ahead in life)

Jimmy looks back and sees the exchange. Damn, now I'll have to rent another car. The man takes Ween's keys, punches him in the face, and hops in the hovercar, driving off down a side street.

"Hey! I resent that! Security! Where is my security escort? I demand him aprehended at once! My lord, it's been three minutes! I want my security detail fired at once!"

Jimmy decides to shoot the idiot Lord, but realizes he has left his gun at home. You live, for now. "Get up, stupid. Follow me."

"Stupid? I? How dare you?!?!?!?!?!? Do you have any idea who I am? I am Lord Hughten Ween III, the richest man in Epsilon Pegasi! I don't care what show this is, I wont be on it! Take me to the nearest branch of the KSS at once so I may leave this godforsakken planet!"

"Huh? Show? I was lying. This isn't a show. And there are no KSS offices. I can get you home, but only if you shut up and follow me. Now let's go to the damn hotel, since you got our car stolen."

"WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!? No show? Well, I shall not go one step further! You will take me to the nearest communi-wave (Klonor's version of a telephone) at once, and will then take your leave! I wish nothing more to do with you."

"There are none. Come with me or I will knock you unconscious and drag you along."

Taken aback by the threat and shocked at the obviously unhinged look in the mans eye (Ween has driven many a sane man insane), Ween stumbles along in his wake.

Jim smiles with satisfaction as he enters the local inn. He pulls a canteen of water from his pack and hands it to the clerk, who waves him up. Jim grabs Ween's hand and tows him along to the second floor, where they enter their room. Almost the entire building is made of mud. An outhouse-like toilet jutting out from the room opens out to the back of the inn, where weeks of excrement from inngoers is piled up. There is a small shelf inside a closet recess in the room's wall for setting one's belongings on, and two twin-sized beds (they are really just raised parts of the floor, made of sun-hardened mud like almost everything else on the planet) covered in thin sheets of leather and a thick blanket. There is one small window in the wall with a hide covering to keep out the cold at night. This spartan room is actually very good as inn rooms on Mirfak III go.

As Jim enters Ween just stands there and stares........and stares....... and stares...... and then he stares some more. He eventually does open his mouth (to offer one of his usual idiotic comments about how great he is and how fired Jim is), but one glare quickly shuts him.

He finally takes a step into the room, taking a huge wad of bills out of his pocket. He then commences to cover ever surface he can with money.

Jimmy sighs in despair and lies down to sleep. "I suggest you get some rest. I know it's substandard by your measure, but until I can get you out of here this is the way it'll have to be."

Ween sighs in disgust, and continues to lay down his money. Eventually he manages to coat his entire bed, and some of the surrounding floor. With one last gruff sigh he sinks down and lies on the bed.

Jim falls asleep as the sun sinks below the sandy horizon.

When Jim falls asleep Ween gets up and walks out of the room, heading down to the lobby.

Stopping a random person (who he assumes to be the consierge)

"Excuse me, I'm Lord Hughten Ween of Epsilon Pegasi. I'd like a limo brought to me, and transportation arranged for me to get off planet. Thank you good man."

Turning away (after giving the random person a hefty tip) he heads over to the corner and sits to wait for his limo.

The man simply walks out of the building, throwing the worthless bills on the ground as he does. He goes to the pub.

OOC: I keep foretting his money's worthless.

IC:

Ween continues to sit in the corner, waiting for his limo

OOC: Does he wait until morning? 'Cause nothing is going to happen until then unless he does something.

OOC: Yeah, he's just gonna site there for a while. He might do the same thing over again (wtih some other random person), but nothing new

OOC: Does he ever get tired?

IC: The dawn comes and Jim wakes up to find himself alone in the room. His hopes of freedom are dashed when he walks down the stairs to find his charge sitting on the waiting room bench. He yawns and begins cleaning his ear with his finger. "How long have you been down here?"

OOC: You would not believe the advanced versions of Speed that my nation has

IC:

"Oh, I'm just waiting for my limo since you seem to have forgotten to order it. Now, where's the banquet? I'm rather hungry."

Jim almost laughs. "There's no limo, and there's no banquet. Am I getting through to you at all here?"

"Yes, you are. I see that you are a most incompetent servitor. Once my limo arrives I shall leave you here."

Jim shakes his head. "You can wait until you die, but no limos are coming. Now come on. Unless you want to skip breakfast?"

"Fine then. I shall eat, then fire you."

Jim thinks a moment, then smiles. "No.... No, that's okay. I'm fired. I'll tell you what, you try your best to get by on your own. I'll be waiting upstairs in the room all day. Tomorrow morning, if I haven't seen you by then, I'll leave. Good luck."
Jim goes up to the room and sits on the bed. There now. Problem solved. Either he realizes he can't get by and comes back, giving me the advantage over him; he finds another person to help him out, making him somebody else's problem; he gets killed, making him nobody's problem; or he learns to care for himself here, making him his own problem.

As Jim walks away Ween stands there for a minute, then walks outside. Stopping the first person he sees (this guys gonna get stabbed one of these days. You can't keep stopping random people and giving them ordes) he begins to enter into his usual speech

"Greetings! I am Lord Hughten Ween III, richest m...."

Unfortunately, the man shoving him to the ground interrupts his speech.

"How rude! This entire planet is so uncouth. I shall never visit it again. Now, where is that banquet? Exucse me, sir?"

And it starts all over again

Across the street from him is a pub, houses and various businesses (brothels, mostly) line the rest of the road. There aren't many people about yet, but those that are are mostly opening their shops or going into pubs for breakfast.

"....richest man in Epsilon Pegasi. Can you tell me where the banquet is?"

This time, his audience isn't as violent as some past viewers. This man, looking quite well off compared to some others walking past, actually bothers to give a response.

"Yes, you see that building over there? With the two women dancing out front? That's were the banquet is. I'm sure they'll have everything you need."

He walks off, whistling to himself. He was paid a finders fee for every customer he sent in, and today looked like it was going to be a profitable day.

OOC: LOL! I can't wait for him to find out personally just how worthless his money is! Go in! Go in! I need to RP this one!

He walks in (Run free with this one! Go wild!)

The tavern is very dark, smoke fills the room as people sit at the bar and at card tables smoking. There are bloodstains on the floor, testaments to the more high-stakes gambling that goes on here. The tables, chairs, and bar are made of wood, most of it dirty and etched-in. The establishment is staffed by a grumpy looking middle-aged man and two unattractive women. There are open chairs at both the bar and the card tables.

Ween walks up to the bar, signaling to the middle-aged man staffing it.

"Yes, I am Lord Hughten Ween III. I'm sure you've received word of my coming. I'll require the finest table available, and the most expensive food you have. I must have at least 5 waiters. Don't worry, you shall be amply recompensated for your services."

The man regards Ween suspiciously. "You got something to pay for that?"

OOC: I was kinda aiming for Ween buying lots of food, running up a huge bill, and then having it be discovered that he's got no money worth anything.

IC:

"I assure you, my funds are adequate."

OOC: Someone of his character? No way. Besides, with all the shady people on this planet all business is pay in advance.

IC: "Let me see your payment then."

OOC: I was thinking it'd be funny as hell. They'd ruff him up a bit (or a lot) and he'd cry like a pansy

IC:

"Here it is, the finest currency in the Klonor Empire"

OOC: No, they'd take all that he had and kill him. And I don't want the RP to end so quickly, no matter how funny it is.

IC: The bartender takes the bills and looks at them in puzzlement. "What the hell are these? Paper? What's the Klonor Empire?"

OOC: You couldn't have said that before? My entire plot that I'd planned for his in-bar adventures has gone down the tube

IC:

"The Klonor Empire? Why, it's nothing except the greates of all nations. And these bills are backed by my estates, which are greater than the Dukes!"

OOC: Oh well, you can't win 'em all.

IC: The bartender is almost crying. "The greatest of nations? Your estate? The duke? Who the hell are you?"

"Who am I!?!?!?!?!?!?!? I AM LORD HUGHTEN WEEN III! The Richest man in Epsilon Pegasi! How dare you question my currency?"

"Yeah, whatever. Listen, I'll give you a meal for your shirt."

"A commoner? Wear my clothing? Unheard of! If you suggest such a thing again I shall have you thrown into the stockade"

"You'll do what?" The man's tone turns deadly. "No payment, no food. Get out."

"Well, I never! You'll never see me in here again!"

The man goes back to looking bored. "Until you get something to pay with, I'd better not."

With a huff of indignation Ween stamps out of the building, angrily glareing around for the man who had sent him in

The man who directed him to the establishment islying in a pool of his own blood in the middle of the street. Evidently he bothered the wrong potential customer.

Ween stomps over to him (at least what's left of him), leaning down and yelling, "You sent me to the wrong establishment! There was no banquet in there! I demand directions to the proper building! Now!"

He leans closer, expecting a response

The man continues to be dead.

OOC: That's it? Nothing beyond "The man continues to be dead."? Come on, put some effort into it!

IC:

Ween stands there, still waiting

OOC: That's it? Nothing beyond "The man continues to be dead."? Come on, put some effort into it!

IC:

Ween stands there, still waiting

OOC: What do you want from me?! Fine, I'll do something else!

IC: A dust cloud rises in the desert outside of town, visible from where Ween is standing. The cloud draws closer and a distant group of hovercars comes into view through the dust, heading at full speed toward the city.

OOC: Now, was that so hard?

IC:

Ween looks up, seeing the dust cloud moving towards him. He turns away from the body and starts to walk towards the arriving cars.

"Excuse me! Yes, I'm Lord Hughten Ween III. Can you direct me to the banquet?"

People on the street begin running to their homes and shutting the doors and windows. In under a minute the town's streets are deserted. The cars enter town and continue heading straight for Ween.

He patiently waits for the cars to arrive (never having to work for anything he's never been in a hurry), and then walks towards them, repeating his question at a distance where they can actually hear him.

The convoy halts and a tough-looking young woman steps out of the lead car. "Who the heck are you?"

OOC: And here we go again.....

IC: "Me? Why, I am Lord Hughten Ween III, the richest man in Epsilon Pegasi. And who might you be good lady?"

The woman turns back to her group. "Care to introduce me?" The group choruses "Carlimi Fina! Leader of the Rogues!" Carlimi turns back to Ween and walks forward, looking him up and down. "I've seen better looking men, but you're not bad. What group do you belong to that you dare to stand in our way?"

"Group? Well, I'm a member of the Klonor Yaht Club, the Epsilon Pegasi Whizzles League (Whizzles being a high-society game in Klonor), the Club for the Exceedingly Wealthy (sadly, there's actually a club in real life of this name and purpose)....."

He continues on for quite a while

Carlimi puts her finger to Ween's lips. "Shut up."

"Excuse me? Did you just tell me to shut up?"

His attempted intimidating tone and posture fail miserably in the face of the non-pathetic people he faces

Carlimi nods and pats him on the head. She turns back to her group. "What do you think? Shall we use him as a toy?"
The group choruses the obvious answer. "Yes!"
Carlimi takes Ween's hand and pulls him back with her to her car. "This way, Lord Hobson Weed."

"I shall not! You have no right to dictate orders to me! John....George....blast, what was that guys name? Jery? No, Jimmy! Something of that effect. Come help me!"

Jimmy watches from the hotel window. No way in hell am I going to cross Carlimi Fina for that idiot.
Down on the street, Carlimi stops in puzzlement. "Jimmy? Who's Jimmy?"

"Maybe it was Jesse. Or Johansen. I can never remember the helps names. He's my servant. He's up in that room"

Accompanying his statement is a gesture at the appropriate room.

Jimmy ducks out of sight quickly. Damn you Ween, you'll pay for this.
Carlimi smiles and gestures at a group of men in a truck near the convoy's front. "Go fetch us another guest, will you?" The men scramble out of the truck and head inside. Moments later, Jimmy is brought out and made to stand beside Ween. Carlimi bows. "Well, the party's all together. Put them in the back of that van." Ween and Jimmy are promptly shoved into the back of a van, the doors shut tightly and locked behind them, plunging them into total darkness. The van starts moving again, along with the rest of the convoy. Ween is kicked hard in the face by Jimmy. "Damn you Ween! You didn't have to drag me into this too!"

"I know I didn't, but I felt like it. There's no need to thank me. Where are we going?"

He ducks quickly to the side

"And do watch your feet. The swerve of the car seems to be jostling you to an extreme degree."

Jimmy swears profusely as he knocks his head into the van wall by accident. "I'm going to kill you, you idiot!"

"Ah, that must be that new-age slang I've heard about. I believe I catch your drift. Thank you very much. I'll kill you, too."

He continues to smile that smile of his

Jimmy could swear that if there was a light smoke would be seen coming out of his ears. He begins crying in anger. "Arrrrrgh!!! I'm going to die at the hands of the Rogues, just because I helped you! I should have never pulled you out of that rubble! Die! Die! Die! I hate you!"

"You know, if I didn't know better I'd think you were serious. I'm glad I know you better than that (He just me him two days ago!). So, where are they taking us? This is so mysterious!"

He's almost giggling with glee

"Ever been raped, tortured, and killed before? They're taking us to where they can do that to us. Do you hear me?! Raped, tortured, and killed! And it's all your fault!"

"You know, I'm beginning to suspect that this isn't a planned ride. Is this some sort of prank?"

Jimmy smashes his head repeatedly on the side of the van until he reaches blessed unconsciousness.

"Jerey? Are you there? Did you fall asleep? Oh, I can not believe this! How can I expect good servitude if the servant falls asleep on the job? This planet is getting worse and worse. Hopefully this ride will improve things."

The convoy stops after a few hours that seem like days, then noises can be heard outside as the Rogues set up camp. No one bothers to retrieve Ween and Jimmy. Jimmy manages to stay unconscious with pure willpower.

Ween continues to blather inanely to himself

After a time, things begin to quiet down. The doors of the van are opened and Ween and Jimmy are dragged out. The convoy is ringed around a large array of tents and small apparatus' of various natures. They are tied to a post at the edge of the camp as the Rogues eat, drink, and make merry around their bonfires.

"Oh, this is so exciting! This planet is much less dull than I first thought. Tell me, what happens next?"

With no response he asks again.....and again......and again....and again.

Eventually he turns back to Jim with the same question

As the Rogues get outside of hearing range, Jimmy replies in a whisper. "Now we escape. I'm going to use a knife to cut this rope. I know you don't understand much, but get this through your head: If you make a sound before we're out of here the rope isn't the only thing I'll be using the knife on; I'll use it on your throat."

"Oh, how exciting! I've always wanted to do something like this. Tell me, when do we start?"

"Now. So shut up." Jimmy cuts the ropes and turns on his companion. His look is deadly serious, enough so to get through to even Ween. "Follow me. Do not talk. Stay low. If you don't, I will kill you. Nod if you understand."

OOC: He's serious here. If Ween messes up before they get out he's going to die, if not by Jim's hand then by the Rogues'. If that's okay with you, by all means let him talk away.

Ween, barely restraining his giggles, nods and follows. At one time he lets out this little "ha", but other than that keeps silent.

Jim leads him from one car to the next, but all are locked. "We shall have to strike out on our own." He pauses as he looks at the stars to get his bearings, then he points out into the desert. "That way. Go. I'll walk behind and cover our tracks. With any luck they won't think it's worth it to come after us."

Still giggleing (God, does this guy ever not giggle?) Ween heads out, practically prancing in the dark.

The two walk that way for hours. Finally, as dawn breaks, Jim digs a foxhole big enough for both of them, then covers it with a thin sand-colored sheet. It has small holes to allow air in. "We'll rest here until evening. The wind isn't bad, so we should be able to avoid being buried. By dawn tomorrow we'll be in Raventown." He takes a drink from one of his many canteens and offers it to Ween. "Drink up, then rest. If you wander off you'll die in the heat so settle down."

"Ah, I'm quite thirsty."

He takes a sip, then spits it out in disgust

"What is this? Water? Plain water? Are you joking? I only drink purified and enriched hydro-oxy combo. Are you trying to insult me?"

Jim is beyond caring about anything Ween says. He takes his canteen back. "Fine, don't drink it. More for me."

Ween grumps and mumbles, but still refuses to drink. He pushes the canteen as far away from himself as possible, and then just sits there moaping.

Jim falls asleep quickly as the sun begins to reach its zenith.

Ween, after another hour or two of pointless rambling, also falls asleep.

As the sun begins to sink below the horizon, the chill awakens Jim. He gathers his canteen, pack, and blanket; and shoves Ween to awaken him. "Let's move out." He climbs out of the foxhole and starts off in the same direction they had traveled the previous night. Over the horizon ahead of them a dim glow can be seen, evidence of the city they are approaching.

Ween continues to stumble along after Jim, starting his idiotic ramblings all over again (nothing more to add in this situation)

OOC: I just want to say, in the course of things, how awesome this RP is turning out.

IC: As the first glow of the sun shows over the horizon, Ween and Jim enter Raventown. The city is very dreary, even more so than every other city on the planet. Everything is rundown or broken, and the people make almost no noise as they walk about in the early morning. Jim leads Ween into a bar and sits down, ordering a small meal and alcohol. He hands the bartender some cases of bullets as payment.

OOC: I'm glad, I thought you might be getting bored since Ween just does the same things over and over again

IC:

"Yes, I will have a braised rack of koornact, with a side of hunseeel, and a glass of Alarian Ale. Make it snappy!"

The bartender ignores Ween and, after a short wait, hands Jimmy a plate and glass containing what he ordered. Jim begins eating as he speaks to Ween. "If you want food and drink I'll buy it for you, but it won't be anywhere near as fancy as you are used to. However, you're welcome to starve yourself if this stuff is below you."

"Ooooooooh, I see. It's part of the game. Sure, I'll have what you're having."

As it's brought to him he remarks to himself

"Only one waiter, wow. This is roughing it!"

Jim hands the bartender additional payment and continues eating his own meal.

Ween eats

When the two finish it is light outside. Jimmy leads Ween to the local hovercar rental shop.

*see last attempt at renting a car*

The manager of the station explains that he is out of cars at the moment, and tells Jim to come back before the shop closes. So, Jimmy makes his way to another bar and sits at a card table, playing a round of Poker with a shifty looking old man.

"Ah, 5 card draw? May I get in?"

Jim finishes the first game. "Do you have anything to bet besides your worthless currency?"

"Worthless? This currency is backed by my estates...... (He goes on for quite a while. Again) However, I also have my family watch."

He then takes off a solid gold watch studded with diamonds which he had hidden in a flesh colored pouch at his wrist

And now I have to go. Bye Everybody! I'll be off for about a week (sorry). Going on a cruise. Bye!

Jim's eyes widen. "Hmm... I'll put five canteens against it." The other player gets up and leaves.

OOC: Ween will probably refuse this bet; after all, he still doesn't realize the importance of water on this planet.

"You have five Canteens of Durango (Durango is an extremely small religion on Denebs second planet, they call their holy books "Canteens". Very rarely seen by off-worlders they are extremely valuable. So valuable that even this rich @$$hole appreciates them)? But how? No matter, I accept."

Jim takes the deck. "You all right with Blackjack?"

"Black Jack? (Spitting sound) A fools game!"

He grabs the deck, shuffles three times, flips each card twice, and begins to deal lightening fast

"The game is no limit Texas Hold 'Em. Blinds to the first two betters, burn on each re-deal. What's your bet?"

He then sits, waiting for his opponents to check his cards

OOC: Do you know how to play Texas Hold 'Em?

OOC: *blink* I have a basic idea, but I don't know the specific rules. Besides our first bets, what else is there to bet?

OOC: The canteens and the watch would be the original blinds, bets that we are required to pay. We are each dealt two cards, we look at the cards, and then bet. A card is then burned (placed face down and out of play) and three cards are placed face up in the middle for both of us to use. We bet, then another card is burned with another one dealt after that. Another bet, then one final burn and deal, then we do the final bet.

Jim sighs. "I'll put up a leather pouch if you have something of equal value."

Again mistaking the common item for some other rare and (monetarily) valuable item he pulls another diamond out of his pocket and lays it on the table.

With a riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiif he burns and deals, laying a 7 of Hearts, an 8 of Spades, and a King of Hearts on the table.

Jim looks at his cards, a Queen of Hearts and a Three of Hearts. He was on his way to a flush. His face shows disappointment, a product of his bluffing.

The Pompous Ass, excuse me, I mean Lord Hughten Ween looks at his cards, a 9 of Clubs and a 6 of Spades. Possible straight.

He looks at Jack (does this guys name keep switching around), easily reads through his pathetic bluff, and throws a small cube of Gold onto the table.

OOC: I gotta go to bed now. My grandparents are bugging me. (Jesus, I'm 17 and my grandparents have given me a bed dtime. Can you believe it? But I love 'em anyway)

OOC: Jim! Jim! Dammit. Sorry, the last time I RPed on Mirfak III my main character's name was Jack. I keep getting confused.

IC: Jim cocks his head. "I'll see it."

OOC: I'm hoping that translates into 'turn over the next card' somehow. I only know one form of poker, and it ain't this one.