NationStates Jolt Archive

Announcement from the New Corporate Nightclub Conclave

Greetings the world, last night, when as usual the nation was in it's perpetual partying agents working for the Nightclub Owners Conclave were sent to the homes of the members of the small liberal government that had announced last friday that they were going to ban all forms of capitalism and disban all form of government in order to bring about a "Human Party Utopia". Our answer was to have every member of the weak liberal government killed, then taking control of the nation's small military we declared a new government for Keoki, the Corporate Republic of Keoki and we have declared a state of emergency in order to bring the nation under control. We hope that the international community supports our rise to power and we promise that the Perpetual Party (as Keoki is famous for) will go on unhindered but it will become a big money maker for the new Corporate Republic.

~Clubowner Linus Peabody

You seem a bit of an emigma. You say your all corporate, but your economy is kind of bad. Anyway..
Free Pacific State is appaled by the fact that the new government's leaders were simply killed, and condemns their killing.
However, as long as the citizens are given good civil rights and good political freedoms, we will ignore these killings.

Galdania orders this 'government' to hold democratic elections, or we will be forced to intervene.

Galdania orders this 'government' to hold democratic elections, or we will be forced to intervene.And the Resian empire (consisting of us, Martian Resi Corp, Defacto Russia, and Bandonia) will intervene if you attack this glorious new government.

Would it be too much for us to ask for a seat in this fair corporate republic? We say without gloating that you could profit from our knowledge.

Thou Shalt Not Commit Murder

Heathenistic Sinners!

Thou Shalt Not Commit MurderHeathenistic Sinners!Actually, I believe that it's "Thou shalt not kill."

*is reminded of Trigun* 8)

No, it's actually Murder... I think... :?

No, it's definitely "Thou shalt not kill."

Decisions, Decisions.

To order the capitalist pigs to hold elections and immediately pay for the killings, or to hide from the might of the Resi Corporation.

I believe "Thou shalt not murder" was mistranslated to "thou shalt not kill" in some bibles.

Decisions, Decisions.

To order the capitalist pigs to hold elections and immediately pay for the killings, or to hide from the might of the Resi Corporation.We're both RGGA, for what it's still worth. If anything, you should side with us. :)

I believe "Thou shalt not murder" was mistranslated to "thou shalt not kill" in some bibles.

I happen to know that this is true. The original Hebrew said "Thou shalt not murder."

Tahar Joblis condemns this appalling act, and refuses to recognize the new goverment of Keoki.

As a leading producer of bulk ethanol and seaweed, we refuse to trade any more with this vicious nation until a civilized government has gained control.

Decisions, Decisions.

To order the capitalist pigs to hold elections and immediately pay for the killings, or to hide from the might of the Resi Corporation.We're both RGGA, for what it's still worth. If anything, you should side with us. :)

If you remember correctly, I got kicked out. And I co-founded it!

And plus, we don' need no stinking RGGA! Alliances make you have to pay attention to other people's enemies, even if you have none!

The People's Republic of Galdania has our full moral and military support behind their ultimatum towards Keoki. This kind of corporate corruption in government should not be allowed to remain.

http://www.redsun.org/images/lenin.gif
Premier Bomfy
Centrist Republic of Aequatio

The reaction of the public in Keoki?

Total apathy.

"I could care less who rules the country so as long as we con keep up the Perpetual Party!"~ Amy Smith, College Student, 18

"Whatever man, pass the bong."~ Todd Makeson, Club Goer (one of the "Living" Warhols), 19

"This is sweet man, now we can fix the nation's economy which the liberal government just killed, of course we will continue to allow the tourists and college kids and the public to keep up the Perpetual Party, we will even make the drugs and liquor cheaper and lower the drinking age from 18 to 12."~ "Lord" Caramon Peri, Clubowner, 35

Elections for what has been called the "People's Burrito Government" will be held tomorrow.

~Flyer found on the streets of Keoki City

OOC: It's going to be a puppet government that will obey the beck and call of the Nightclub Conclave.

Premier's Office: Magna Casa, Aequatio

"I don't like it, at all." commented Bomfy, looking at a photocopy of the flyer.

"What's not to like, Sir, they're holding elections?" said Deputy Premier Kate Juno.

"It's too sudden, as if they just did this to get us off their case... I want to keep an eye on this nation, I want to make sure that there is no corruption going on and that the corporations aren't running the government in Keoki." said the Premier, "If anything doesn't look right, then we'll go in and make sure it's done right."

http://www.redsun.org/images/lenin.gif
Premier Bomfy
Centrist Republic of Aequatio

OOC: Your gonna love this, the canidates for the office of President are the following, a porn star, a frat boy, a Club Kid (a person who dress up like a little kid and goes to nightclubs), and the lead singer in a famous techno group in Keoki.

IC: Flyers passed around in the clubs:

Put a checkmark next to the person you want to be President of Keoki.

Candy Suxxa: Porn Star, will bring about more liberal views on public sex and nudity, will make lapdances tax deductible.

Brian Teddy: Frat Boy from Delta Beta Ta at the University of Florida, will give random people gaudy titles and give everyone free paddles.

Mikey Douglas: Club Kid, will give all the people that have Club Kids Membership Cards seats in the Senate, all Club Kids will never have to pay taxes gain.

Tammy "Omega" Vega: Lead Singer in the group The Beat-Alls, will make it required that at least one Beat-All's song be played in the clubs per night and twice a day at the beach parties held during the day.

Premier's Office: Magna Casa, Aequatio

Premier Bomfy was sitting at his desk reviewing a lobby group proposal on tax deductions when Kate Juno walked in with a photocopy of a "ballot" from Keoki and handedit to him.

"Look at that, it's wrong on so many levels it's not funny." commented Juno.

"What do you mean--" Bomfy cut himself off when he read the ballot, "What kind of joke is this, this isn't a ballot... it's comedy show lineup."

"Shall we move to intervene then?" asked the Deputy Premier.

"Not yet, I'm still trying to figure out why the sensible people of their nation aren't saying anything about what's happening. Keep an eye on the situation and report back to me when the election results come in." ordered Bomfy.

"Yes Sir."

http://www.redsun.org/images/lenin.gif
Premier Bomfy
Centrist Republic of Aequatio

Announcement from the Nightclub Conclave;

We have finished picking the ballots off of the floors of the nightclubs (at least the ones that survived becoming smokin' papers for the users of marijuana. We are currently counting the ballots and soon we will have a President for the New People's Burito Government! ...or were we calling it the People's Taco Government? Anyway we wil; have the results in soon, but beforehand the female canidates will have a wet T-shirt contest for your enjoyment.

~David M. Portus, CEO of The Spot (a nightclub) and Head of the Nightclub Conclave

Why don't yoou just have elections?

Why don't yoou just have elections?They do, if you'd read it. >_<

Why don't yoou just have elections?They do, if you'd read it. >_<

I did, damnit.

bump

Ugh, I don't care either way if he has Elections or not... This nation is the apitamy of demoralized society! Perpetual Party!? Legalized Drugs?! Achohal consumtion by minors!? Dear lord, the whole country is a Sadom and Gamora (Sp?)... And shall eventaully suffer the same fate...