NationStates Jolt Archive

The Shambles - Weekly News

15-11-2003, 09:16
All the news that's fit to print from The Shambles. The big news stories this week ...

* Interim Council Criticised for Election Delays
* University Opens Doors for new Year
* Savique Christian Plan to be extended
* Rock band questioned over drugs find
* News in brief....

* The Interim Council has been criticised by the Electoral Commission it helped to set up for delaying a General Election. The Chair-elect, Ynal Salin, told "The Voice" newspaper that a lack of democracy in a new nation would never be popular with electors, calling the delay "due to party political pressures."

The Interim Council, set up during Independence Talks, has delayed any concrete plans for elections until a report into how those elections would be run is complete. However the conservative People's Voice party has condemned the delay as a "fustrating farce", and called for the SDP to act on early election promises. As yet, there is no set size for any new Parliament, nor any confirmation on how the EC would gather names for registration. The IC estimated last month that any election "from scratch" would cost around 1.2m Cg.

* Makedon University has opened its doors to students for the first time since closing down in March following the so-called "Photocopy Scandal". The campus has welcomed 500 students in the first wave, all of whom studied at other Universities across the Dominion in the interim period. All 2,000 students will return by Spring.

Following the "Photocopy Scandal", Principle Symon Ampithatre was jailed for his part in the multi-million cymraeg exam fixing racket. Police found completed exam papers and assignment packs were being doctored for cash in return to assist the Uni's pleas for extra funding. Five students were expelled and barred from studying in the Shambles for a year.

Following the scandal, Parliament debated a Bill to tighten University funding rules, but the Education Funding (Regulations) Bill failed to be passed.

* The Savique District Council has voted to extend the "Cross in His Hand" Christian teaching progamme to all schools and its one adult education establishment. The SDC, criticised by non-relgious groups for its promotion of the CiHH system, allowed 500,000 Cg to be used in the promotion. Savique has the highest percentage of Christians within the Dominion, and has been at the centre of calls for a new moral focus in life throughout the Dominion.

Ygli Tent District Council voted on Tuesday to trial CiHH next year. The system used videos, books and debate groups to being the Christian message to non-belivers and belivers ailke. The system was banned in some nations following fears it used subliminal messages and bribing of officials. No claims were ever proven.

* The Shambolique language rock band Iglen Romandi ("Ugly Rumours"), who have enjoyed success in the charts for nearly 10 years, are bring questioned by Albanija District Police following a drugs find at their studios in the Malta District town of Sant Dominique. Police from the two Districts worked together on the case following an interview by the band in which they claimed to know how to "hide" drugs in music equipment during tours.

The band were chosen by the Interim Council to headline a post-independence gig this year. The new album, "Yn sá hast" ("In No Rush"), was released in March. The band have not commented on the claims.

* The Shambles was awarded its own Internet domain name on Monday. The .sq name reflects the name of the country in its native language.

* Working mothers have had their Tax Credit system postponed following a computer fault at the company responsible for paying the monies. It is understood 1,000 mothers may be owned thousands in missed back pay.

* A new body set up to design The Shambles' bank notes has been confirmed by the Interim Council. The Currency Commission will report next year on the design plans.

And that's it from this week. More next time on the Shambles news review!
Walmington on Sea
15-11-2003, 14:32
The Black Pony; a public house in Little Stockton, WoS

A man whose name he couldn't remember was doing his level best to defend the best of all possible systems as it existed in the best of all possible worlds.

"Democracy is not dead.. you're drunk!"

"I am not democra..drunk.. democracy is a shambles."

"Funny you should say that- I'll probe it to you. What about what's his name?"

"What about him?"

"Why don't you give him a call?"

"What for?"

"Ask him about his house."

"You want me to call what's his name and ask him about his house?"

"Why not?"

"Alright, what's his number?"

"I've no idea, I've never met him."

"Neither have I, what the f*** are you talking about?"

"Your relative with a house in Savique!"

"We can't go to Savique, there's a war on!"

"Right there is- in defence of democracy! I'm glad you remember!"

"'s against fascist empires though, isn' it? Try telling them about your democracy!"

"Are you saying they're going to win?"

And the pair promptly forgot about their proposed trip, as one fell from his stool with a rather over-the-top bump!

16-11-2003, 15:34
Very much OOC - :shock: :?: :?: :?: