Wombat News
12-11-2003, 13:27
From a comfortable, but deep, lead-lined hole in the ground, Wombat News
In an interview this week appearing on ISN, Lady Sirithil nos Fëanor, Elentári of the Eternal Noldorin Empire of Menelmacar recalled the "good old days when it really looked like we were going to finally nuke SeOCC" (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=90723&start=0). In a candid tinterview, Lady Sirithil admitted that "waking up in the morning knowing that nuclear war could occur at any moment made it a truly exciting time to run the world."
Now, however, as media attention has all but abandoned SATO and CACE's decades old conflict over who pulled whose hair first, in favour of watching grass grow, Lady Sirithil admits that the "day to day governing of the world is becoming a drag". "Let's face it, threatening to let the nukes fly is a lot more interesting than worrying about boring stuff like make-up and the millions of SATO citizens who go without television on a daily basis."
While understanding the undeniable media appeal of grass, Lady Sirithil sought to remind the press that "we're a bunch of fanatics too, and we really have nukes, not like certain dictators who just talk big".
When asked to comment on Lady Sirithil's remarks, SeOCC Minister of Politics Talia Ellman-Fogg admitted that she too "missed the excitement and tension that only nuclear war can bring to the table". "In fact, even now I find myself starring at the red hot-line phone and wondering whether she'll call," said Ellman-Fogg, in reference to Lay Sirithil. "At the time, I was outraged at her hollow threats and outlandish allegations. It's only now that I realise just how much I miss it."
Despite the last few months of relative calm in the region, Wombat News cites a leak from an unnamed Australian Marsupials government source indicating that a number of neutral nations were secretly collaborating on sophisticated "ignore" technology that, in the event of war, would entirely cover CACE and SATO, thus allowing the two coalitions "to nuke themselves to death without bothering the rest of us".
"When it's all said and done, the rest of us don't really care if CACE drops the big one on SATO or vice versa. In fact, it would be a prime opportunity to decrease the world's population by several million. Not to mention dust off whacked-out fanatics on both sides. We just don't want any radiation to end up in our backyards. And for once, most nations agree with us," said the Australian Marsupials prime minister who refused to be named.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS - YOUR THIRD EYE ON REALITY
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid87/pda22c0ab2140ceb42cbbf0f2271afd5b/fa9f249c.jpg
In an interview this week appearing on ISN, Lady Sirithil nos Fëanor, Elentári of the Eternal Noldorin Empire of Menelmacar recalled the "good old days when it really looked like we were going to finally nuke SeOCC" (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=90723&start=0). In a candid tinterview, Lady Sirithil admitted that "waking up in the morning knowing that nuclear war could occur at any moment made it a truly exciting time to run the world."
Now, however, as media attention has all but abandoned SATO and CACE's decades old conflict over who pulled whose hair first, in favour of watching grass grow, Lady Sirithil admits that the "day to day governing of the world is becoming a drag". "Let's face it, threatening to let the nukes fly is a lot more interesting than worrying about boring stuff like make-up and the millions of SATO citizens who go without television on a daily basis."
While understanding the undeniable media appeal of grass, Lady Sirithil sought to remind the press that "we're a bunch of fanatics too, and we really have nukes, not like certain dictators who just talk big".
When asked to comment on Lady Sirithil's remarks, SeOCC Minister of Politics Talia Ellman-Fogg admitted that she too "missed the excitement and tension that only nuclear war can bring to the table". "In fact, even now I find myself starring at the red hot-line phone and wondering whether she'll call," said Ellman-Fogg, in reference to Lay Sirithil. "At the time, I was outraged at her hollow threats and outlandish allegations. It's only now that I realise just how much I miss it."
Despite the last few months of relative calm in the region, Wombat News cites a leak from an unnamed Australian Marsupials government source indicating that a number of neutral nations were secretly collaborating on sophisticated "ignore" technology that, in the event of war, would entirely cover CACE and SATO, thus allowing the two coalitions "to nuke themselves to death without bothering the rest of us".
"When it's all said and done, the rest of us don't really care if CACE drops the big one on SATO or vice versa. In fact, it would be a prime opportunity to decrease the world's population by several million. Not to mention dust off whacked-out fanatics on both sides. We just don't want any radiation to end up in our backyards. And for once, most nations agree with us," said the Australian Marsupials prime minister who refused to be named.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS - YOUR THIRD EYE ON REALITY
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid87/pda22c0ab2140ceb42cbbf0f2271afd5b/fa9f249c.jpg