NationStates Jolt Archive

Jim Dawson (Associated press) - Today, the extravagant but extrangely popular hell bovinian heavy metal band, ''System Of A Cow'', has announced its intentions to start a world tour. The group plans to give shows on the biggest heavy metal-loving nations of the world, and to play its more popular songs like ''Dead To Mc'Donalds'', ''Milk Straight From Hell'', ''Pasteurize This, Bitch'' or ''I Ate A Teenage Human''.
Bumpy Hoovishmelody, singer of the group declared: "Yeah, It's cool. Now we can bring our view of the world to the rest of the living creatures. Perhaps we can now convince them that meat-eating is evil"
Gork Darkw00t, guitarrist of the group simply declared: "Shibby!"
Anyway, the government of hell bovines is currently arranging which foreign countries want to be a part of the tour.
Some say these hell bovines are dangerous, with their extrange vegetarian ideas and their worshipping of Diablo, but this reporter personally thinks that they are just harmless wacky cows.

Nations on the tour: (will edit list to update it)
Hell Bovines
Feline
Imitora
Henceland Omega
Ravenspire
Famicon
Credonia
Warnocks Wizards
Tanah Burung
Oglethorpia (special recital with the performance of an oglethorpian band, Leviathan)
Rabid Liberals
Gilmeecia
Buri
Daistallia
*Final Recital on board the USS Cowland*


OOC:
So... Here is my innovative RP. If you want your nation to be a part of the tour, post it here. I will then roleplay with my band members and you can roleplay the reactions of the public.
This may be a sucess...or a failure. That's why it's 'innovative'. :wink:

While heavy metal is not that popular in our nation, consumption of animal products is banned, and surveys show that 92% of citizens would not eat it if there was no bad. Ergo, you might prove to be a bit more popular than most heavy metal bands here. It's your choice if you think you will make a profit by coming here.

While heavy metal is not that popular in our nation, consumption of animal products is banned, and surveys show that 92% of citizens would not eat it if there was no bad. Ergo, you might prove to be a bit more popular than most heavy metal bands here. It's your choice if you think you will make a profit by coming here.

Great! Then, your nation is officially the first stop of our tour. :)

Bumpy, singer of the group, was in the camerin with the rest of the band members: Gork Darkw00t - guitarrist, Misty Hellsugar - Baterist, Martin Shadyhorns - guitarrist and Felix Blackcow - another singer.
Bumpy received the fax first: "Hey cows (guys), listen this. Feline is our first stop i the tour"
Misty: "Great! I have the feeling this will be a great sucess"
Gork commented: "Shibby! A nation called 'Feline'. It's kinda dark. It's cool because.....y'know.... sounds dark and stuff."....

"Fifteen kay," the man in a buisness suit said, looking at a sheef of papers in front of him. The papers were also in front of five other venue executives, all placing a bid for the concert. The person able to bid lowest, within reasonability, would win. From there on, it was up to that exec., and his or her sponsor, to ensure a good turn out. Currently, James Gatchbe was in teh lead with a $15,000 (AC) bid. He needed somethign good. In two days, Saliva, The Offspring, and Limp Bizkit were all going to be at The Center, sponserd by Imitora Military Industires, one of the two biggest venues in Imitora. The other biggest was The Green Field, sponsord by Imitora based Infinity Soda, who would be hosting U2 in four days.

Gathbe represented Bond Systems, a automotive parts manufacturer, and was the booker for Open Air, a larger venue just outside down town Vertas, on the northern coast of Imitora.

With the silence of the other executives, he knew he had won. Open Air had been having troubles booking good bands, and hopefully, this would change that streak. Gatchbe, upon returning to his office, sent a message to the Bovinian band, offering a 10.3 million deal, in their choice of currency, for a show date.

"Fifteen kay," the man in a buisness suit said, looking at a sheef of papers in front of him. The papers were also in front of five other venue executives, all placing a bid for the concert. The person able to bid lowest, within reasonability, would win. From there on, it was up to that exec., and his or her sponsor, to ensure a good turn out. Currently, James Gatchbe was in teh lead with a $15,000 (AC) bid. He needed somethign good. In two days, Saliva, The Offspring, and Limp Bizkit were all going to be at The Center, sponserd by Imitora Military Industires, one of the two biggest venues in Imitora. The other biggest was The Green Field, sponsord by Imitora based Infinity Soda, who would be hosting U2 in four days.

Gathbe represented Bond Systems, a automotive parts manufacturer, and was the booker for Open Air, a larger venue just outside down town Vertas, on the northern coast of Imitora.

With the silence of the other executives, he knew he had won. Open Air had been having troubles booking good bands, and hopefully, this would change that streak. Gatchbe, upon returning to his office, sent a message to the Bovinian band, offering a 10.3 million deal, in their choice of currency, for a show date.

"Cool!. Our nation will benefit from this (there's no private property in HB)" Misty exclaimed.
"Look at this, 10 million bucks", she said while handing the new fax to his companions.
All the sentient bovines stood there open-mouthed
Gork only could articulate one word: Shibby!!
"Great, I'm calling our representative to answer this imitorian bussinessman. Of course we are accepting"


Estimated James Gatchbe,
I'm writing you in reply to your offer of paying 10.3 million USD for our band to play on your beautiful nation.
Me and the band members have agreed to accept, and the show will take place the 14th of December in any place you wish inside your nation.
We thank you for giving this great chance to hell bovinian music and we promise we won't let you down.
Yours sincerely,
Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.

Memo: To the agent of "System of a Cow"
From: Forge Muyo, President of RHPB at Buff University

Greetings! We have heard much about System of a Cow, and here at Buff University there is a cult following. "Pasteurize This, Bitch!" is a HUGE hit here on campus. We wonder if you would be so kind as to make a stop here in Mia, Henceland Omega to play for the college. If you could send us your availabitlity, and the charge, we would love to work something out.

-Forge Muyo, RHPB President, Buff University
The Holy Empire of Henceland Omega

I suspect the band might prove rather popular in Ravenspire. While there are not many vegetarians within the nation, Ravenspire is one of the most egalitarian states in the known universe, so we anticipate no problems. How does a double-bill with local goth-folk dream-pop band Annabel Lee at Kitsuki Stadium in Sargard sound? We are prepared to offer either a $10 million flat fee for a three-date commitment, or 25% of the grosses, as you prefer.

Loryn Immeryl
C.E.O., Kitsuki Technologies

Though the Famiconian people have been found to be extreme meat eaters, the are also the HEAVIEST MOTHERFUKKING METALHEADS you will find in all of NationStates, and as such would like System of a Cow to play at Utopia Rock, near our capitol city Utopia City, along side Cradle of Bodom and Iron Priest, two Draztonian bands.

ooc: what i'd like to know is what instruments cows, not having opposable thumbs or even fingers, are able to play.

(ooc: they're not cows. They're Hell Bovines. They are gods :twisted: )

(ooc: they're not cows. They're Hell Bovines. They are gods :twisted: )

OOC: Actually, we are just wacky humanoid cows... and we do have prehensile hands(or hooves). Anyway, you can worship us as gods if you want to do so :P

IC:

To the authorities of: Henceland Omega, Ravenspire and Famicon

Our band 'System Of A Cow' would love to make a stop at your beautiful nations. We thank you for giving such great opportunity to our music.
Yours,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.

By the way, time to submit your countries to be added into the tour ends tomorrow (10/29) at 22:00 hs. GMT.....

Many of our youths here in Credonia would love for System of a Cow to make a tour stop here. We invite them to perform in our newly erected Kaimoni .A. Sutton Amphatheatre.

Many of our youths here in Credonia would love for System of a Cow to make a tour stop here. We invite them to perform in our newly erected Kaimoni .A. Sutton Amphatheatre.

Great! added to the list! :D The cows will love to perform at the Kaimoni .A. Sutton Amphatheatre.

Greetings Hell Bovines Cow-folk. While our nation tends to favour ballads and Elvish folk songs, we would like to extend the hand of friendship to your nation. Your band is cordially invited to perform during halftime at our upcoming World Cup qualifying match on Matchday 5 at Fortress Warnock in Warnocks Wizards. Please let us know if you'll be able to make it.

Ufhur the Hated
Minister for Sport, Empire of Warnocks Wizards

You know we must have System of a Cow visit Tanah Burung. Without them, our lives are not complete.

Dude, System of a Cow...you guys rock.

So uh, I sing for this punk band, right? Yeaah, we're called Leviathan.

We're this bitchin' trio of guys. Can we open for you?

I'm sure we can secure some dates in Oglethorpia.

"Uncle" Joe Benson
Guitar, vocals -- Leviathan

Rabid Liberals would love to have you come over. We may eat meat, but we catch it ourselves! Seriously, though, our nation has a huge heavy metal fan base. You'd be very popular here.

*********************************************************
To Ufhur the Hated (from Warnocks Wizards), Tanah Burung, "Uncle" Joe Beston (from Oglethorpia) and Rabid Liberals:

Great is to find more nations that are fans of SOAC. We thank you for opening the doors of your nations to our music, you won't be dissapointed.
Hughs,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.
*********************************************************

Inside the camerin, the band members were getting ready for the tour...
Martin Shadyhorns grabbed a list of the nations in the tour: "Wow, cows. I can't belive we are going to visit all this nations. Hear this names: Ogretorpia!..are they ogres?."
Gork Darkw00t: I dunno. Anyway, I can't wait to play at Warknoks Wizards. Y'know....all the Mt.Doom and dark stuff. It's, y'know, shibby!"

Yeah, uh, President Lou said for me to tell you that he wants to host a stop on the "Cow System" world tour-thingy. He said he still feels bad about the Ron Goldenspot incident, and since Krantzengil and Guildenstern never actually got executed, he thinks it'd be a nice show of solidarity to let your Heavy Bovetal band play at the National Stadium.

He wants to know, is it okay if the vendors sell chicken-dogs during the concert? Or does the Cow System have some unnatural aversion to eating meat? Just let us know about that.

Ned Itchlesby
Foreign Minister
The Oppressed Peoples of Gilmeecia

Memo: To System of a Cow
From: Forge Muyo

Thank you for your reply! Please let us know the date(s) you will be in Henceland Omega, and we will make all the arrangements.

-Forge Muyo, President of RHPB Buff Univserity
The Holy Empire of Henceland Omega

Dude, System of a Cow...you guys rock.

So uh, I sing for this punk band, right? Yeaah, we're called Leviathan.

We're this bitchin' trio of guys. Can we open for you?

I'm sure we can secure some dates in Oglethorpia.

"Uncle" Joe Benson
Guitar, vocals -- Leviathan
********************************************
Dear "Uncle" Joe,
By reading your letter again I realised that your intention was that your band 'Leviathan, performs a show with SOAC. The band will love to host a shgow with yours, we just need that you give us the date when you want the show to take place. Thanks for you offer.
Best wishes,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.
********************************************

Yeah, uh, President Lou said for me to tell you that he wants to host a stop on the "Cow System" world tour-thingy. He said he still feels bad about the Ron Goldenspot incident, and since Krantzengil and Guildenstern never actually got executed, he thinks it'd be a nice show of solidarity to let your Heavy Bovetal band play at the National Stadium.

He wants to know, is it okay if the vendors sell chicken-dogs during the concert? Or does the Cow System have some unnatural aversion to eating meat? Just let us know about that.

Ned Itchlesby
Foreign Minister
The Oppressed Peoples of Gilmeecia
********************************************
Dear Ned Itchlesby,
Thanks for this show of soldarity. The cows will love to play at your nation, although i fear your populace won't be so enthusiastic about the anti meat-eating message.
Anyway, we will love to play at your great nation, but I fear you shouldn't sell chicken-dog meat curing the concert to avoid incidents.
Best wishes,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.
********************************************


Memo: To System of a Cow
From: Forge Muyo

Thank you for your reply! Please let us know the date(s) you will be in Henceland Omega, and we will make all the arrangements.

-Forge Muyo, President of RHPB Buff Univserity
The Holy Empire of Henceland Omega
*********************************************
Dear Forge Muyo,
Is the 28th of December (OOC: Not in Real life) ok for the concert? I hope so. If not, tell me and I will happily change the date for one that suits you.
Best wishes,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.
*********************************************

Okay, i'll tell the guys. This is gunna be awesome.

So for now, we'll just plan to open up for you guys on the Oglethorpian dates -- not sure if you want us to tag along for the rest of the tour.

Man, this is gunna be awesome.

-- "Uncle" Joe Benson
Guitar, lead vocalist
Leviathan

---

LEVIATHAN is...

Joe Benson
Guitar, lead vocals

Jeff Covell
Bass, backing vocals

Sven Gustaffson
Drums

Memo from Forge Muyo:

December 28 will be fine! We willmake all the necessary arrangements, and we look forward to hearing you in concert!

Dear System of a cow,

Im not a vegetarian, but Im a huge fan of yours! Please play a part of your tour in Buri, we would be happy to provide transportation if you need it!

-Prince Buri
President of the principality of Buri

Dear "System of a cow",

We would like to apologize for the blatent informality of the Prince's memo, he has a tendancy to lose himself when he's excited, child rulers often have such problems.

-Sincerilly,
Zogath, Prime Minister of Buri

The Daistallian Inaugural Comittee would like to enquire as to the possiblity of System of a Cow playing at the national Celebration. We would note that System of a Cow has charted at number ten on the Daistallian music charts.

Taeing Lash, National celebration Comittee chairman.

OOC: The national celebration has been a slow moving party RP. SofaC would be an entertaining addition. We hope you don*t mind if you are seen as a group of guys in cow suits by our people, as we don*t openly acknowledge the existance of non-humans.

OOC:
I'm sorry to tell you this, but I fear I will have to pospone this RP for one week. The problem is that I'm having a lot of exams at the moment and I'm not able to log in very oftenly. But, as soon as the exam period ends, I'll start this RP.

IC:
System Of A Cow will happily play on Daistallia and on Buri. But we fear that due to technical problems, we will have to pospone the tour for some days. We hope this doesn't cause you any inconvenients.
Best wishes,

Himi Haylover, artistic representative of System Of A Cow and secretary of the Ministry of Arts and Culture.

(OOC: I will post a seperate thread for the Utopia Rock festival, as Draztonia will be participating in it as well, and bands from other counrties might show up too. I'll let you know when and where next week.)

http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=91609&start=0&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=

you are expected here later along the RP