NationStates Jolt Archive

A construction yard within Skittletopia's borders

"Okay. Haul away Mac"

a bright yellow Caterpillar digger raises a patch of earth from the mudcaked ground. the Foreman walks round the other end to investigate and notices a large metal hook.

"What's this then? hey Casper! get that crane over here!"

the crane swings over and a man hooks the hook to the ring the gives the OK signal for Casper to lift the object. they wish they hadn't...

the mud cracks, as a ten foot wooden inverted crucifix emerges. I.R.N.I is carefully engraved into the crossbeam... and something terrible is attached to it. the five workers on the site reel in horror at the site...

Half an hour later

All roads leading to the site have been completely cordoned off. six black unmarked choppers sweep the area with floodlights. a man in a silver o'connor-garcia is flagged through by a stern faced security guard and saluted. his car reaches a large white marquee erected around the site, and he steps out and enters.

CNS: Today, officials confirmed that an intern at the National Museum has lost one of our most valuable artifacts, namely the Cross of Jesus. If you find it, The National Museum would like it back as soon as possible. Thank you in advance.

CONTINUE!!!!

Jezus?

Alternate Reality Figure?

In an allyway bar somewhere, two men sit at a table in the middle of the room... A waitress brings them two pints, and a man yells at the baseball game...

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, we've done the carbon dating tests and everything checks out..."

::takes a drink:: "It just.... I mean, I still cant believe it... It's almost as if it shouldn't be real"

"You don't need to 'believe' anymore since it is 'real'... and what's even more real is how much money we're going to make off of it... The bids are running through the roof..."

"It's ironic how the symbol of the savior has turned into the source of sin.."

::A woman slaps a man, throws the rest of her beer in his face and storms out::

A man pulls back the silver sheet covering the artefact... and a seasoned forensic scientist takes one look... then projectile vomits ...

the man in the white coat approaches and studies the contorted face of the thing on the cross with interest... the forensic scientist summons up the strength to take a photograph but the man shouts "NO!" and deflects the camera away from the thing before snatching out the film and burning it with his lighter. "Do you have any idea what this is?"

everyone shook thier head...

"This... was a 15th Century capture... and an attempt to kill it. what lays before us is one of the previous Incarnations of Lucifer. if this gets into the wrong hands... we're fucked, he shakes his head. "completely fucked, to put it bluntly"

a van pulls up and hastilly bundles the find into the back before a team in white overalls spray the entire tent with a white fire extinguisher type device.

"Imagine, if you will, a foreign power, aquires the genetic code of Lucifer, and using cloning teqniques creates the son of the devil... the Antichrist"

there is a nervous shuffling

"That is why, we have to do this, gents, sorry."

he drops a canister to the floor and a purple gas seeps out. the new arrivals cover thier faces with masks until it dissapates. then they stand bemused for a second and look around at the inside of the marquee.

"...So we've now extracted all the unexploded ordinence from the site. so you fellahs can get back to work."

"Unexploded ordinence?"

"yeah. you dug up a bomb. you don't remember? oh. the payload must have seeped a little and given you temporary amnesia in the STM. very common with this kind of device, the force psychologists tell me."

They seem to accept this. but the Forensic, had been unaffected by the gas due to his vomiting. he slipped a hand under the sheet unseen, and whimpered as his hand touched the beasts, then, he snipped the finger off and slipped it into his pocket before hastilly slinking away.

OOC: This is a good RP. Nice job thinking it up.
IC:
This is gary heartmen here in Skittletopia where it seems that these construction workers have dug something up of great importance. As all the roads to and from the site are blocked, the closest we could get was a half mile. The camera is not equiped with a zoom device, but I do have some binoculars here. I will describe what I see.
...
What ever it is, it is being wraped up and put in the back of a van. It looks to be in the shape of a cross, but Im not sure. It looks as though total chaos is about to break out.. But wait, there is a purple gas rising and everyone but the workers have gas masks on.
(camera cuts and you see the ground going by fast. the camera comes back to Gary but still running)
It seems as though we've been caught and we are being chased. Rumor has it that they found the cross of jesus or a 1 mega ton bomb.
(they climb into the van and peal out of there)
This is Gary Heartmen signing off for B4kst4br World News.

-BWN

http://www.geocities.com/ssjskittle/coatman.txt

the Marquis de Citron, and Commander of the SERA Angels Jason Cuascut is available for interview reguarding what transpired. pose your questions to him.

This is Gary Heartmen again. We have come back to the site after things cooled down. We have here Marquis de Citron. She is I beleive one of the doctors working on what happened.
So Marquis, What exactly happened?
What was that object you put into the back of the van, and what was the purple gas?
In what ways does this "find" affect the rest of the world?
How did the workers come on to it?
Can you give us the chemical formula for the purple gas?
Why is there so much hype over this find?
What is your job here?
How many more doctors and scientists are here?
What do they specialize in?
What say you to all these questions?

OOC: think I got enough questions?

This is Gary Heartmen again. We have come back to the site after things cooled down. We have here Marquis de Citron. She is I beleive one of the doctors working on what happened.
So Marquis, What exactly happened?
What was that object you put into the back of the van, and what was the purple gas?
In what ways does this "find" affect the rest of the world?
How did the workers come on to it?
Can you give us the chemical formula for the purple gas?
Why is there so much hype over this find?
What is your job here?
How many more doctors and scientists are here?
What do they specialize in?
What say you to all these questions?

"First and foremost Gary, i'm a man... Marquis is my title, my name is Jason...

There is no reason to be alarmed, we simply found some old ordinance from the old reigime's weapons expermiments, it's being dealt with... the worker's dug it up preparing a road surface....

The purple gas was a precaution against any possible bio-agents. it kills most of the known ones. we regulaly ship it to nations suffering from thier effects. The object was a missile. we want to see exactly what they used to test here. the hype is absurd. "Crucifix" is what they used to call these old missiles because of thier distinctive shape, it's somehow been perverted into us digging up christ's cross **laughs**

My job? well i was the only person available, this isn't really my jurisiction but i'm glad to serve my country in whatever way i can. i head the Anti-terror unit SERA.

We have a couple of docs checking out the construction workers who sem to be suffering amnesia, probably from the big bomb. there's a forensics officer, a shrink and some local GPs. as i keep saying there is no cause for alarm."

This is Gary Heartmen again. We have come back to the site after things cooled down. We have here Marquis de Citron. She is I beleive one of the doctors working on what happened.
So Marquis, What exactly happened?
What was that object you put into the back of the van, and what was the purple gas?
In what ways does this "find" affect the rest of the world?
How did the workers come on to it?
Can you give us the chemical formula for the purple gas?
Why is there so much hype over this find?
What is your job here?
How many more doctors and scientists are here?
What do they specialize in?
What say you to all these questions?

"First and foremost Gary, i'm a man... Marquis is my title, my name is Jason...

There is no reason to be alarmed, we simply found some old ordinance from the old reigime's weapons expermiments, it's being dealt with... the worker's dug it up preparing a road surface....

The purple gas was a precaution against any possible bio-agents. it kills most of the known ones. we regulaly ship it to nations suffering from thier effects. The object was a missile. we want to see exactly what they used to test here. the hype is absurd. "Crucifix" is what they used to call these old missiles because of thier distinctive shape, it's somehow been perverted into us digging up christ's cross **laughs**

My job? well i was the only person available, this isn't really my jurisiction but i'm glad to serve my country in whatever way i can. i head the Anti-terror unit SERA.

We have a couple of docs checking out the construction workers who sem to be suffering amnesia, probably from the big bomb. there's a forensics officer, a shrink and some local GPs. as i keep saying there is no cause for alarm."
Sorry bout the mix up there.
You said that the pruple gass kills Bio-Agents, but you never said if the missle was bio or chem. Also, the only disease that I know of that impairs memory is alzhiemers, and Im sure that it couldnt have affected them that quickly.
Would you mind giving us some of that purple gas purhaps. The nation of B4kst4br and the station would like to port that to our boi-chem unit so that we may figure out the formula.
One more question, if this artifact as you are calling it, was dug randomly out of the ground, then why would an anti-terror specialist be here, instead of the bomb squad?

OOC: This is after the interview... lol. i thought you'd finished with the questions

Cuascut slinks off pulls out a cell...

"I Want that lie about the crucifix rockets written into pub quizzes and history textbooks, pronto..."

"yes sir... by the way sir, we spotted something during the interview. you'd better take a look."

he looked at the screen, a still of himself during the interview,

"yes? what am i looking at?"

the phone zoomed over his shoulder and showed a man clutching something.

"That's the forensics officer! he wasn't SERA, he was due for a course of amnesia wasn't he?, how did he escape?"

"he vomited didn't he? that must've neutralised the gas"

Jason zoomed on on the object, it was a finger.

"Fuck! check... it, are it's hand intact?"

**rustle rustle**

"no... there's uhh... a finger missing"

Jason reeled in horror. "I want that man found, and that transmission blocked"

"too late sir, it was live internationally."

He looked like he was close to a breakdown, there was a pronounced shake in his voice...

"I sure hope noone noticed"

This is during the interview, before the phone call

This is Gary Heartmen again. We have come back to the site after things cooled down. We have here Marquis de Citron. She is I beleive one of the doctors working on what happened.
So Marquis, What exactly happened?
What was that object you put into the back of the van, and what was the purple gas?
In what ways does this "find" affect the rest of the world?
How did the workers come on to it?
Can you give us the chemical formula for the purple gas?
Why is there so much hype over this find?
What is your job here?
How many more doctors and scientists are here?
What do they specialize in?
What say you to all these questions?

"First and foremost Gary, i'm a man... Marquis is my title, my name is Jason...

There is no reason to be alarmed, we simply found some old ordinance from the old reigime's weapons expermiments, it's being dealt with... the worker's dug it up preparing a road surface....

The purple gas was a precaution against any possible bio-agents. it kills most of the known ones. we regulaly ship it to nations suffering from thier effects. The object was a missile. we want to see exactly what they used to test here. the hype is absurd. "Crucifix" is what they used to call these old missiles because of thier distinctive shape, it's somehow been perverted into us digging up christ's cross **laughs**

My job? well i was the only person available, this isn't really my jurisiction but i'm glad to serve my country in whatever way i can. i head the Anti-terror unit SERA.

We have a couple of docs checking out the construction workers who sem to be suffering amnesia, probably from the big bomb. there's a forensics officer, a shrink and some local GPs. as i keep saying there is no cause for alarm."
Sorry bout the mix up there.
You said that the pruple gass kills Bio-Agents, but you never said if the missle was bio or chem. Also, the only disease that I know of that impairs memory is alzhiemers, and Im sure that it couldnt have affected them that quickly.
Would you mind giving us some of that purple gas purhaps. The nation of B4kst4br and the station would like to port that to our boi-chem unit so that we may figure out the formula.
One more question, if this artifact as you are calling it, was dug randomly out of the ground, then why would an anti-terror specialist be here, instead of the bomb squad?

The head of the bomb squad was unavailable, maternity leave as was the head of the SWAT, skiing vacation. I was the closest thing to them. the big bomb was biological, we can't say more than that at this point. and we're sorry but we cannot release the purple gas for testing, because it would risk the security of the state, if it fell into the wrong hands we fear agents immune to it could be produced. we know they exist now, but thankfully this thing was practically antique, our purple haze had no problem.

I can't reveal who I am, however, i have an, artefact, that may interest some nations, get in touch with me ands maybe we can negotiate payment terms

**nigh-untraceable cell number goes here**

---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---

Skittletopia, Limeport dock twelve. 1050. i want a boat waiting, and political asylum. Believe me, it's worth your time, it's a little piece of what was really dug out of that construction yard.... ciao.

the Forensic expert casually tosses the cellphone into the garbage and leaves.

---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---

the Forensic lights a cigarette and tosses the match, he's approached by Winston...

"I believe you have something of interest"

"Do you have what i requested?"

"Yes, now, what is this thing?"

he shows it to winston, it gave off an aura that seemed to make his mind work backwards

"uhh... interesting... let's... do that uhh"**motions** "thing, with the, boat"

Just then a screech of tires could be heard, then a hail of bullets from a submachine gun impacted all around them, each one taking up a chunk of solid concrete the size of a bowling ball... the forensic grabs winston and pulls him towards the gunship...

---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---

One of the dock warehouses

"Tell us what was in that package"

"I don't know, they didn't tell us anything"

"bullshit... you don't convince me, Marv, bring in the Blowtorch."

Marv waves the lit blowtorch menacingly then blindfolds the sniper... and pulls down his trousers

"AIIIIGH! I SWEAR! I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! JUST PLEASE! SWITCH IT OFF!"

"okay. i believe you, you're free to go. they mustn't keep thier grunts very well informed"

the sniper opens his eyes to see a piece of dry ice being removed from his (intact) genetelia, and the lit blowtorch sat on the other side of the room providing the sound effects... at that point he was the most relieved man in the world.

"we will negotiate your return for the return of the package."

OOC:bump... a splendid demonstration of power of suggestion interrogation causing little or no physical harm to the questionee

This is Gary Heartmen her, Reporting for BWN. Itseems that all hell has broken lose in Skittletopia. Lives have been lost and a sniper is in custody. How do w know this? We are not a liberty to say. But just know that what e presntis true. We also have rason to believ that the object found is not bomb, bt we arent sure what it is. We will bringyou more later.
-Gary Heartmen
--BWN
(Back in the capitolof B4klst4br)

(Christian switches off the tv. He urnshis spinny chair around to face his cabinet.)
Christian:We have a problem hear men. Shotshave been fired over anobject tat is suposed to be a very old bomb. (he glares atthe intellegence minister) Charlie! I want t know what the hell this thing s.

Charlie:Sir yes sr.

Chriain (turns and glares at the foriegn diector) Ben! I want negotiations started imediately.

Ben: Im on it.

Christian: I want this solved by dinner. We are done hear.
(Christian turns around and flips the tv back on.)

OOC: the reason why the BWN knows some f this stuff is throuh bribing.