NationStates Jolt Archive

The title speaks for itself. If you need a reference rp...the most recent one is "The New Girl"
http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=81636&start=0

You stuff in the trial thread looks pretty good, but your other items never really piqued an interest in me. Having to read a dozen or so pages to catch up is kind of a turn off for me........I'll redouble my efforts.

You are doing well, needs a little work and the multiple small posts as opposed to fewer, but bigger posts throws me a bit some times, but thats more a personal style than writing in general. As I said, you just need a little work, but meh, don't we all? You are doing a hell of a job in description, but it seems choppy. . . that could most likely be taken care of if everything were meshed together so you could see how it flows as a whole. . .

just my 2 pence, feel free to ignore me, it is your writing after all, not mine, you get final say.

You have shaped my rping for the better, as my characterss and nation have been effected by your rp skills! Great stuff!

Glad to hear that Kain! You have also helped me become a better rp'er lol.

First of all I have to say that this (NS) is my first RP forum I've ever been on and that the RP's (not many up to the moment) I've made here were the first RP's for me ever. That's why I maybe a little bit influenced because so you are (next to Underaloz; may he come back soon) the first RPer I've ever met and rped with before although I had some looks on other RP's but....HHHUUUUUUAAAAHHHH!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:
GimmemoreGimmemore!
(and I hope you write this book *cough cough*)

:shock: *throws a cookie to earth. The sweet aroma of chocolate chips sweeps past him* Here is a cookie...Use it wisely. :lol:

bow bow
*jumps up and catches the cookie in the air and gulps it down at once. Then looks up at Rave begging for more* whimp whimp

Lets see... I liked the whole vampire thing and I have noticed a trend... every one of my characters that goes to your nation ends up dead. :shock:

Domino, Goor, Reil, Lara, Zedd...

*points finger and shouts meldromaticly* UNCLEAN!!! UNCLEAN!!!

Hee hee.

Anyway, I love your RPs and hope to see many, many more in the future.

Lets see... I liked the whole vampire thing and I have noticed a trend... every one of my characters that goes to your nation ends up dead. :shock:

Domino, Goor, Reil, Lara, Zedd...

*points finger and shouts meldromaticly* UNCLEAN!!! UNCLEAN!!!

Hee hee.

Anyway, I love your RPs and hope to see many, many more in the future.

*laughes head off* after the RP in the lab (A history RP about Azrael/Ravellyn by the by Rave, do you play Diablo II?) I decided that any RP with Rave in it would use a back up charicter that I can throw away with out having to kill of four or five RPs.

But back on topic, Rave you are one of the best RPers I have seen, you helped me learn,

a. how to write well
b. how to do a personal RP

But my all time most deadly RP must have been, El Presidente's birthday party by Slutbum Whala (SP?), We have vampires (No offence Ravellyn) trying to kill the entire party group.

We enjoyed the RPing you did for Kenja Shentavo in the Miss NationStates contest. Beyond that, we really haven*t crossed paths to much.

I think you're a good RPer and better than most.

Things you do well: Good storyteller, good character development, nice plots, and you don't wank/godmod.

Things you don't do well: Anything military (this isn't neccessarily bad, but it's a good skill to have if a bunch of people hate your guts).

I don't doubt that even if someone would try to attack Rave's nation there would be more than enough people to help her (if she would need help).

May the Angel of Death lead the souls of those who attack Rave to hell without doing anymore harm to them. *Remembers that Rave is the Angel of Death* ooops ... errr ... poor guys.

OOC: I haven't RPed with you at all, but I've heard great things.

The only problem with Rave is that I can't say "I have become the angel of death" because the angel of death allready exists :evil:

The only problem with Rave is that I can't say "I have become the angel of death" because the angel of death allready exists :evil:Yep... she has both of them...

Personnaly I think you are a good role-player, but I won't go nuts and say you are a great role-player.

Alot of the things I've got involved in are centred around diplomacy and I kind of avoided character on character RP's, even after I was heavily involved in your characters first threads (where Iesus Christi almost went to war with you) I still went about it the diplomatic way...

After all, I do use the leader of my nation in most character on character RP's... so it limits what I can do with him, if he dies or gets seriously changed it means alot of work which I can't always do.


Anyways... back to the point. I'll admit, when I first started out I tried to take a "mentor" role, but I felt like I wasn't getting anywhere and in part my advice was being ignored. Another thing was the way I had to change my writing style... after all, I wasn't really up for having my characters mind read despite the insanely complex task it would be. I was happy with the outcome though and it stopped all players from using OOC knowledge against me.

I didn't get much of a chance to keep up the RP with you after that, James had a nation to run and it is unlikely that he would just turn up in a bar somewhere.

Overall, I like your RP's and they are well thought out and have a plot to them... I like them... though I can't help but thinking that if it wasn't for James respecting Rave, he would consider her quite arrogant and stubborn, but hell, James himself is pretty much the same so he can't complain...

Argg.. I think that's the end of my rather aim less random rantign but it will do until I can concentrate a little.

You have shaped my rping for the better, as my characterss and nation have been effected by your rp skills! Great stuff!

Note: I really think that your character should keep out of International politics, if I see Kain threaten to open a portal in another nation I may threaten war with your Guy/Nation. I don't mind Uber Characters in their own storylines but they should not be taking on armies... unless it has been discussed with both nations in question.

It's the one thing about powerful characters I will not put up with too often.

I put 'excellent', you egotistical, RP genius... idiot. And get your ass over to the LXGL RP!

-Nik

Ya'll have always come off as an uptight snob to me......And that Kain feller needs to stop goin about threatnin' folk.

(From both Mercenary Soldiers and Wandering Argonians) OOC:
Some of your characters are a bit on the overly-strong side (i.e. Daja, Rave), but your RP's are well-written and enjoyable to partake in. You have also added to the backstory of my fantasy nation's(WA) main RP character: He is now a hunter of vampires, which is interesting considering his friendship (?) with Kain.

*eye twitches* BECAUSE ...ARGH! *looks at nations name and is calmed down by Earth II and throws him another cookie.*

and meep...Daja's dead... :shock:

*eye twitches* BECAUSE ...ARGH! *looks at nations name and is calmed down by Earth II and throws him another cookie.*

and meep...Daja's dead... :shock:

Who's Bubba Shentavo?

-Nik

no idea..not controlled by me.

*eye twitches* BECAUSE ...ARGH! *looks at nations name and is calmed down by Earth II and throws him another cookie.*



*catches cookie and loves Rave more than before* hatchel hatchel

Attention Sigma....SEND MORE COOKIES! WE're RUNNING OUT!!!

*breaks cookie in half and throws a half over to Earth II, still hot...then eats the other half* eyes shift back and forth..no one will steal this cookie.

You have shaped my rping for the better, as my characterss and nation have been effected by your rp skills! Great stuff!

Note: I really think that your character should keep out of International politics, if I see Kain threaten to open a portal in another nation I may threaten war with your Guy/Nation. I don't mind Uber Characters in their own storylines but they should not be taking on armies... unless it has been discussed with both nations in question.

It's the one thing about powerful characters I will not put up with too often.

That was a joke lol! I am sure I stated it was, I was just musing OOCly. I later said that I couldn't do it anyway. I understand what you mean about making my characters no so powerful, I made that mistake in the vampire confrence. Personally, I like my characters being weaker, it gives them something to fear and can have failures. Also, they become more human. (I try to make my characters as realistic as possible, I decided to re-do my main change in Kain, which I am still writing because I was not pleased with it.)

:shock: Anyway...thanks for all your opinions. Some think i'm excellent, and some think i'm the worst thing before sliced bread...
:? *confused and falls over*

Like I said Rave… I’m sticking with very good, I’ve seen better and I’ve seen much, much worse. I don’t know about myself though… I think I’m inconsistent… I love some of the things I do, but a lot of the things can be pretty awful when I’m not in the mood.

As the Inquisition: Burn her as a witch, salt the earth she was burnt on, and then kill all her fledglings.

As Mephisto: DIE DIE DIE!!!!!!!!!

Nice rping.

Rave: *yells back at Mephisto* I'll killll you!!!!!!!!

Qui: *Yells at roania's inquizitors* Go to hell you @#^)U& sons of !&_)@%. Go @(#&@ and @*^*_@# off.

Rave: :shock: *clasps hand over her son's mouth*

Qui: *continues to swear at them*

The Inquisitors start to cry. "Mommy, the bad man is cursing at us."

Hundreds of miles away, a US Marine breaks down in tears.

Mephisto stares openmouthed at Qui. "Are you sure that there's not a taint of demonic in him? That was scary."

Hundreds of miles away, a US Marine breaks down in tears.

OOC: I don't take kindly to insults.

Hundreds of miles away, a US Marine breaks down in tears.

OOC: I don't take kindly to insults.

OOC: Not an insult, I promise, MC.

It's just a joke. Qui swears so harshly that it makes one of the toughest humans on Earth break down in tears. :(

I said you were very good. Probably excellent. What d'you think of me?

*And for those of you who know not why I rated Rave that, well ... Corothisia speaks for himself ...

Coro: F3ck off!

I enjoy your RPs. And since you came back, I'm shipping a crate of cookies.

I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! You're RP's suck!

Because...


1. You're more popular than me
2. Umm...
3. See 1

I like your RPs! I've been waiting for Underaloz to get back on more often to get Vaughn and Rave to visit Jeff in Iansisle again under better circumstances. ;)

Lol....don't know whether to take that as a compliment or cry..i'll chooose compliment. :lol:

Rave: I loves ya Coro! *sends hug...but stops when she realizes that Sigma sent cookies* :shock: *runs from Coro to the cookies*

Coro's just pissed ... He's suffering from ADD (Alexeil-Deprived Disorder)

I like your RPs! I've been waiting for Underaloz to get back on more often to get Vaughn and Rave to visit Jeff in Iansisle again under better circumstances. ;)

Hahahaha... I don't have to wait for Underloz... See! (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=84496)

Even if this is starting things early, I don't suspect that this is part of the event itself so don't worry Underloz...

Coro's just pissed ... He's suffering from ADD (Alexeil-Deprived Disorder)
ha ha ha ha ha ha

At least someone thinks I'm funny.

*gives Rave a "three thumbs up" rating*
:wink:

Even though I'm not into the fantasy stuff, I've read some of your rp's. They're pretty good, keep it up!

thank you. :D

And Haraki...i also need to start a solitary thread between Coro and Rave before the end" thread. ..

i've been watching the rp, i'm kinda new but i like what i see...
ps.


the foul mouth kid needs a spanking and a time out

Qui: kid?! *eye twitches*

(for those of you who know Qui, picture him taking this insult) :lol:

honestly, i think that you are very talented, i wish i could be as creative :D

*gives Rave a "three thumbs up" rating*
:wink:

OOC: You some kind of mutant?

Anyhow Rave, is this because someone else doesn't think you're a good roleplayer? Basically, my advice is this: stop caring what everyone else thinks of you. Just go out and roleplay.

Qui: kid?! *eye twitches*

(for those of you who know Qui, picture him taking this insult) :lol:

*imagines this* *gulp* poor NC, may he rest in peace.

Nice to see that you're getting the feedback of your big roleplaying clique... that's always good.

Time for Slaggy to speak... and please note that I don't normally comment in these things.

Aside from the fact that you are in absolutely DESPERATE need of a spell checker, I deem you above average. Being that I've never been entirely active in your roleplay (aside from the brief Kiki the Shentavo Cat ordeal that made me believe you take yourself WAY too damn seriously...), I'm able to look on objectively, beyond the hype that seems to surround you absolutely every moment you make a post.

I won't try to cover this up, Rave... I believe you're good. As far as the group with which you frequently get involved, I'd put you at the top. However, I have two slight problems with your tactics in roleplay.

1. And this is a little thing... you've never made an effort to branch yourself out and learn from other roleplayers. I think one of the big reasons everyone thinks you're so good is that you frequently surround yourself with people who are worse. No offense to the usual Kain/Haraki/etc. bunch, but it seems true. I've been following the Whispering Voices heresy trial, and with all due respect, you are being totally outclassed. WV is an excellent RPer--definitely one of the best "bad guys" on the site--and you could stand to learn a lot from him. More roleplay like this--and a willingness to learn from roleplay like this--will be good for you.

2. Rave herself. I've never been a big fan of über-characters... and for those who cite Esmerelda (goddess of The SLAGLands, see here (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=67214&highlight=) for more details), I would argue that Esmerelda is a necessary über-character who compensates for überness with SHITLOADS of depth. I'm not too sure about Rave. I mean, come on... from the way I read it, she's an überpowerful angel who is also a VAMPIRE and who is also the angel of DEATH? How in God's name does THAT work? I think I could be a bit more forgiving if I saw significant depth in Rave, but quite frankly, it all seems to be one big series of "holy shit, I'm powerful and have a whole lot of fans" threads. The way I see it, if I can't follow it--and I'm a third-year English major with a specialty in modern writing who is expected to be able to follow this sort of thing, you're trying too much. Tone down with the über powers that surround Rave and, for God's sake, show me Rave.

I think you're good enough to compensate for these two problems and become one of the greats. Until that time, though, to me, you'll just be slightly above average.

-Slagdor the Roleplayer
-Widely Considered One Of "The Greats"
-Receives Danishes On Demand

:shock: Slag was the Shentavo Cat? :lol:

:shock: Slag was the Shentavo Cat? :lol:

Aye, I've said this several times now... ;)

So you're not for characters like Siri or Morgoth? Makes sense, I 'spose, because all realistic characters need flaws. However, Rave at least has a couple of levels to her, which is more than I can say for some uber-characters. That's why I don't use 'em, fun as it may be to blow up a building with the wave of a hand. Besides, I have robots that can do that anyway.

So you're not for characters like Siri or Morgoth? Makes sense, I 'spose, because all realistic characters need flaws. However, Rave at least has a couple of levels to her, which is more than I can say for some uber-characters. That's why I don't use 'em, fun as it may be to blow up a building with the wave of a hand. Besides, I have robots that can do that anyway.

I let Melkor and Siri slide because they do have depth to them. Melkor's player does a damn good job of following the Silmarillion (sp?) just about to the letter. Melkor's pissed, yes, but he's not without his reasons. As for Siri... hiding behind that façade that exploits every damn desire in the mind of the fanboy (Come on... a powerful hot elf wizard chick who flies around in spaceships and has an anime sigpic? If you're not aroused, you're not much of a dork... or you're a woman... or you're gay... or you're me.) is a character with a tremendous amount of depth. Siri's player roleplays her very well, and although I REALLY disagree with some of the shit she gets away with military-wise, I give her this: Lady Sirithil is a damn fine character.

“Nice to see that you're getting the feedback of your big role-playing clique... that's always good.”

To be honest, I can see where you are coming from with the idea of a “clique”… for people on the outside, and often I feel like I’m on the outside myself… I only just found out about the “angel of death” thing which I’ll comment more on later, but it can be quite hard to role-play with her because you don’t feel like part of it all.

The part I find hardest though is making sure not to go against the huge linier plot that Rave has in mind, I went nuts over the “Vampire Conference” because I thought that Whispering Voices may kill off a load of characters which were not meant to die in that thread… I could of lost James at any point in that conference because it would have been fun watching the nation fall into a crusade against hunters. But with others they have spent time setting things up and I didn’t want to ruin it.




Aside from the fact that you are in absolutely DESPERATE need of a spell checker, I deem you above average. Being that I've never been entirely active in your roleplay (aside from the brief Kiki the Shentavo Cat ordeal that made me believe you take yourself WAY too damn seriously...), I'm able to look on objectively, beyond the hype that seems to surround you absolutely every moment you make a post.

I loved Bubba Shentavo, it was a great little satire which should be taken in good fun. To a certain degree I felt that the role-play of the characters was pretty good two…


1. And this is a little thing... you've never made an effort to branch yourself out and learn from other role-players. I think one of the big reasons everyone thinks you're so good is that you frequently surround yourself with people who are worse. No offence to the usual Kain/Haraki/etc. bunch, but it seems true. I've been following the Whispering Voices heresy trial, and with all due respect, you are being totally outclassed. WV is an excellent RPer--definitely one of the best "bad guys" on the site--and you could stand to learn a lot from him. More role-play like this--and a willingness to learn from role-play like this--will be good for you.

As much as it may hurt my current RP, I would have to agree. I have always felt that Rave is a good role-player, much better then lil’ inconsistent me. But I’ve seen much better.

2. Rave herself. I've never been a big fan of über-characters... and for those who cite Esmerelda, I would argue that Esmerelda is a necessary über-character who compensates for überness with SHITLOADS of depth. I'm not too sure about Rave. I mean, come on... from the way I read it, she's an über powerful angel who is also a VAMPIRE and who is also the angel of DEATH? How in God's name does THAT work? I think I could be a bit more forgiving if I saw significant depth in Rave, but quite frankly, it all seems to be one big series of "holy shit, I'm powerful and have a whole lot of fans" threads. The way I see it, if I can't follow it--and I'm a third-year English major with a specialty in modern writing who is expected to be able to follow this sort of thing, you're trying too much. Tone down with the über powers that surround Rave and, for God's sake, show me Rave.

Well, I must admit, the angel of death things I pretty much didn’t pay attention to, I’ve only just noticed it and I can see the connections made, not that it makes much difference. My characters are never going to be god-like and I role-play them in awe when they meet others who are. James is currently going a little insane because of all the messed up stuff that is happening to him.

Personally I find that to be part of a Rave thread you have to almost completely submit yourself to her plot which a lot of people are not willing to do… but I don’t think I mind because I’m not going to be fighting her or opposing her like some people will be.

Meh… once again I’ve lost focus (assuming I had any) so I’ll leave it at this for the time being.

:shock: Slag was the Shentavo Cat? :lol:

:shock:

I mean...yeah....anyway... The reason that really got to me, is that it was a really dramatic serious thread considering what had just happened. But...if you want to put in kiki here:
http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=77415&highlight=&sid=5f255b9388e625c2843a0a84022bcc62

go for it. :D

:shock:

I mean...yeah....anyway... The reason that really got to me, is that it was a really dramatic serious thread considering what had just happened. But...if you want to put in kiki here:
http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=77415&highlight=&sid=5f255b9388e625c2843a0a84022bcc62

go for it. :D

No real desire to do so, thanks. That idea mainly came from a running gag on IRC. Actually, as I recall, the Shentavos had a puppy named Jaws on IRC, but "Jaws the Shentavo Puppy" wouldn't fit, and I didn't like how "Jaws the Shentavo Dog" sounded.

So is this the only aspect of my comments (read: Crimmond's comments about me) that you're going to address, or are you just going to take what I said to heart, go forth, and sin no more? ;)

I think one of the big reasons everyone thinks you're so good is that you frequently surround yourself with people who are worse. No offense to the usual Kain/Haraki/etc. bunch, but it seems true.

So you wanna say I'm a bad RPer? Take this! *pulls his überschweren Großflächen-deatomisator /4. Generation and aims at SLAGLands* *realizes what he does and hides his 9 feet long weapon behind his back* errrr :oops: ...wanna buy some roses?
(hey, I'm still learning [and hate english :evil: ])

May there be better RPers or worser ones, I don't care. I still love Rave's RPs (although I would never try to attack Rave with a character I want to use in later RPs (not only Rave but also Qui etc. pp..... :wink: ) )because I think her RPs are fun and well thought (compared to some other RPs I've seen). Maybe this is only the oppinion of a crazy guy who loves to read scifi and fantasy but...who cares?! I still have fun.
And I think that's all that counts: having fun.

*sits on the floor waiting for another cookie*

*throws him another cookie* :lol:

So you're not even going to address your biggest critical comments on this thread, Rave m'dear? ;)

Are those the cookies I sent you?

Ok. I haven't played with you before and I normally don't read rps I'm not in, cause...well, no time...but I went through some of the sample thread and it totally rocked. *Claps*

Slag, I just took your constructive criticism...were you expecting a fight? :lol:

Rave: *eep* Erm....Sigma....eep..*runs away with the rest of the cookies*

*runs after her and jumps around her feet* BOW WOW *coooooooooookies*

Slag, I just took your constructive criticism...were you expecting a fight? :lol:

Honestly, from you, I was. You seemed very defensive about your roleplay. Glad to see my preconceptions have once again been proven wrong. ;)

lol. I am defensive...I really am...but there is nothing to argue against. I know I need improvement, that's why I started this thread, to find out what I was doing wrong and build on it.

Okay ... Having thought hard about the comments made in this thread, and assessing what I've been seeing, I now have some constructive criticism to offer ...

Rave Shentavo:

Well, for one thing, your quality of posts could stand a bit of improvement. You've definitely progressed from the very beginning, from your first posts, but I still see ways you could improve your roleplaying, especially in my eyes. One way you could, is to use Story-format posts. I've seen the only type of writing you use is script-format, although you've been working on an interesting blend between the two lately. I don't know why, but for some reason seeing Script-format IC posts bugs me.

Second, your characters could use mroe depth. Lately, again, it's been getting better, but you could still use some work. Yes, this is something I've seen most nations on NS need, including, yes, I'll admit it, me. Most of my characters lack depth. I choose one thing, one way that they are, and then they don't change. But, seeing this fault in myself, I'm stopping. I'm cutting down on the number of characters I use, so that there's room in my RPs for character development, because it's a lot easier to make a character feel real if you're not roleplaying ten people in one thread. But I've noticed that your characters seem single-minded, and the exact same person they were three months ago.

Third, your characters seem a bit too powerful. Yes, I know that many people could say this exact same thing to me, and I'm guilty of it too. But again, I'm working on that. I give downsides to my characters, such as: Any powerful magic-users I make, I give their magic side-effects. A common one for me to use is having to draw magic from the land. Hence, a small spell won't affect anything, but a large spell, or a large expenditure of energy, could create a ten-mile wasteland around them. Your characters, I've noticed, seem very powerful, and don't have side-effects. Rave, for example, is a seraphim, an ancient vampire, Azrael, and the Angel of Death into the bargain. I mean, don't you think that seems a little unbalanced? Especially given the fact that you don't seem to have thrown in any weaknesses. And the fact that when she dies she gets reincarnated as another person, qho inherits her pwoer.

Fourth, I've noticed that you seem to improve on all these points when you have only one person in a thread, as opposed to your entire assembled cast. I advise you to try roleplays with only one of your characters, and then try and make all your RPs that way.

If I think of any more, I'll post them.

And the fact that when she dies she gets reincarnated as another person, qho inherits her power.
.

Ah...i have plans for sage....but none of involves inheriting Rave's power...i have many twists and turns for the end. :lol:

(thanks for the critque by the way...)(It's sad, but I'd rather see negative ones rather than positive)