NationStates Jolt Archive


A cabinet meeting in Valonia (few pictures)

06-10-2003, 17:33
A cabinet meeting in Valonia

Excerpt from official record. Cabinet meeting. Oct 5. 2003. 18.30

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ypm21_ministers5.jpg


Prime Minister Canaris Right, last topic on the agenda tonight. The population explosion, I believe the Minister of Interior Affairs had a briefing prepared for us?

Minister of Interior Affairs Yes Prime Minister. As you undoubtedly are aware, the overcrowding of our beautiful islands has reached grotesque proportions. The population density in the major cities, Natria, Monterey and Taninn has soared to 20 people per square meter

Prime Minister Canaris Good grief!

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ypm17_jim1.jpg

Minister of Interior Affairs. Indeed, while the situation looks slightly better in smaller urban areas, there is hardly any more places to build. Unless we cut down our forests or plantations, it's hard to find a square inch of soil that isn't covered by 20 storeys of concrete by now.
Maybe it's time to repeal the wildlife preservation act.

Prime Minister Canaris Thats completely unacceptable, I was elected on a green platform! There must be another solution.

Minister of Interior Affairs Well short of turning parlament in to a housing project, I'm not sure what more we can do *shuffles his papers and shrugs*

Prime Minister Canaris. This is a complete mess. How did the population grow so fast anyway. When I took office this was a nation of 5 million people. 2 weeks later it's 12 million. How on earth is that possible!!

Minister of Immigrations *cough*, well you did sign the refugee act. I think we slightly underestimated the effect it would have. The regions around us are very unstable.

Prime Minister Canaris. 7 million refugees in a week my god. We must repeal that act at once!

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ypm22_humphrey5.jpg

Spindoctor Sir with all due respect, we can't do that. It would be like admitting we don't know what we are doing.

Prime Minister Canaris. Well we obviously don't, how on earth am I going to defend this to my voters. My approval ratings must be terrible.

Spindoctor Well, according to the last survey. 5% of the original population thinks you're a great humanitarian, and the rest that you're a *shuffles his papers* ah, yes a complete idiot. I wouldn't worry about it.

Prime Minister Canaris. Don't worry about it?? I'm up for election in 2 years man!

Spindoctor Yes Sir I'm aware. But remember. While only 5% of the original population would vote for you today. You would be wise to remember that they are now a minority, and almost all of the immigrants will be likely to vote for you in gratitude.

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ym34_jim2.jpg

Prime Minister Canaris. Oh.. I see your point. Let's leave the law as it is then and take it up to review after the election. However, we still need to make a plan to accomodate all the new vote I mean refugees.

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ym14_tomsargent.jpg

Minister of Defense Sir, if I may. I might have the solution to the problem.

Prime Minister Canaris. Oh? Well speak up then.

Minister of Defense Yes Sir. As you know, Valonia has been downsizing it's military ever since the independence. I suggest you change your policy on this issue and enlist every other male between 19 and 25 (1 million men).
Then start purchasing high quality weaponry from the international arms dealers until we can fund our own weapons industry. Once we have a potent force, we ATTACK an alliance free neighbour for whatever reason your medialackeys can think up. If the invasion is succesful, your overcrowding issues will be solved for a long time. If it's a failure, well then there's suddenly freed up space for another million people. Either way, problem solved.

Prime Minister Canaris. You must be out your mind! That is the most deplorable, dispicable, immoral and senseless waste of life I have ever heard of. And we can't afford it anyway. Are there no other suggestions?

http://www.yes-minister.com/images/ypm15_jimdorothy.jpg

Minister of Science and Education Sir, I have an idea, it might be a bit farfetched but I think in our current situation it's worth considering.

Prime Minister Canaris. If this is about mass sterilizations again, I don't want to hear it.

Minister of Science and Education No sir, I was looking at a map just recently and something occured to me.
Valonia has a very limited landmass, while the sea around it has vast upportunities for settlement, exploration, mining and so on. I suggest we set down a taskforce to look in to this. I believe several nations around the globe have experimented with undersea technologies. Perhaps we could *aquire" them in one way or another.

Prime Minister Canaris. Submerged cities? That sounds incredibly expensive.

Minister of Science and Education Well, I suppose we could do research in genetic engineering and try to grow gills. But I doubt you like that plan better.

Prime Minister Canaris. You're bloody right I don't. Is this really all you could come up with?

*All ministers stare at their feet*

Prime Minister Canaris. Fine, for a lack of better options. Make a unformel inquiry to the global markets, but for heavens sake be discrete. I don't want to see stupid headlines like "Valonia sleeps with the fishes" in tomorrows paper.

All ministers Yes Prime Minister.
Adejaani
07-10-2003, 00:38
OOC: :lol: Tag for later viewing. And also BUMP! :D
Konania
07-10-2003, 00:39
Semi-IC

In truth, we believe you should look under yourselves to solve your population issues. The land below you, if stable enough, provides an infinite amount of territory.

Also, we have come to believe in the concept of building cities wherever possible. It is not uncommon to see a Konanian city built into a cliff.

Finally, we have discovered the value of building upward and onto the seas. Such a city can be supported by the ground below, and transportation can be in the form of elevated walkways, maglevs, etc.

I'm sure you will find an adequate solution.

--Department of World Affairs
07-10-2003, 00:39
20 per square meter??? :shock: Wow, you either need to expand or contract the plague.
Tyros City
10-10-2003, 23:06
ooc: ROFL

Great one XD

---

ic:

One of the always exploiting, gold- hunting, immoral DA- capitalists in Valonia 'accidentally' heard of the discussions...

Well, not exactly accidentally, as the population problem was THE Topic on the islands. It was hard not to realise it`s importance.

Ok, it was impossible.

However, now he was there, and he presented them is project... rather excited actually, with a bit of fear... His employer would fire him if he wouldn`t fullfil his contract quote, his wife was pregnant...

Well, this was his last chance, and he had to use it:

[ooc: *assmes he comes through security, etc etc, as this stuff is REALLY boring, and after all, he does not plan anything evil*

"Dear gentlemen: You may know what we have done: We build, and are currently building the power plants your nation needs.

Now, i`m here to propose something else, a product from a corporate nation you know you can trust, a nation that has no ill feelings towards you, a nation that acts in the interest of the people. And a corporation that will fire me if you don`t sign this contract. Please, remember, i have family, and you surely don`t want my child to starve, will you?"

He hesitates, clears his throat.

"Anyway: DA had considerable experience with 'UWB' technology. Or 'sub- aquatic domes', as a more neutral term, which wont immediately attract nukes from some nations that were previously glassed by GDODAD."

He sips from his water, clears his throat again, and once again, thinks about his wife and his unborn child. At least she wont betray me when in the sixth month...

"Well, we could build them for you. Of course, our ressources are limited, we are currently building our second one, however, with our current technology, we are able to fit 330000 people within one dome. The tech to create fast and efficient connections to the mainland exists as well, so that expensive subs aren`t neccessary, although still useful.
Security can of course be guaranteed, three hulls, etc etc.

At the moment, we could start with building three domes, finishing them within three years. Within nine years, considering an expansion of our numbers of equipment, we can build thirty- three domes, enough place for nearly eleven million people.

Of course, such a project isn`t cheap. As a matter of fact, it`s horribly expensive. 33 billion DA Credits [ooc: Identical to Euro] POer dome are neccessary.

It means that your nation would hardly have any money left for defence etc.

BUT I`m not only advocating the bubbles/ domes, but DA loans!

With an interest rate of only 9%, we can lend you as much as 363bn DA Credits, of course, 40 2/3 bn DA Credits per year!

So, if you think this is neccessary, just DO IT!

OR you give DA corporations extraterritorial rights (Here he pauses... he has no right, no permission to offer this, he would have to negotiate with other companies so that they allow him what he proposes... but he has to risk it, and, sweating, he continues.) and the right to exploit the underwater ressources of your nations, what yould reduce the interest rate to mere 3%!"

He stops again, hesitates, looks into the eyes of the ministers before him.

"So, what do you think?"

Edit: Of course, i`m Der Angst, i should REALLY switch nations <.<
10-10-2003, 23:18
In Lisbon, the home city of The Lady and the center of all that was Synchronized (which was all of Spain and Portugal and the territories of those two former nations). Daecon looked over a report with Ambassador Kerlius I about overpopulation in an island nation called Valonia.

"If I know anything about the un-synchronized humans they will consider Imperial Expansion to solve their overcrowding problems." Kerlius said as she petted her cat Exeion. "If they consider invading the Azores or the Canary Islands they will suffer the wrath of The Lady." Daecon said with perfect certainty. "None the less if they do chose such a path we might consider attacking first and use the 'Get them before they get us' policy as an excuse to spread The Word to their people and Synchronize them." Kerlius I suggested. "I will recomend this to The Lady and I am sure she will agree with this plan, but for now let us watch this quietly."


http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:XsCg5vUPFW8C:www.geocities.co.jp/Playtown-Domino/3727/milk.jpg
Ambassador Kerlius I
There Is Only One, And That One Is Daemon
The Dominion of Synchronized


http://uts.cc.utexas.edu/~ifex534/deacon.jpg
Daecon: Advisor to the Lady and
High Priest of The Church of The Word
There Is Only One, And The One Is Daemon
The Dominion of Synchronized
16-10-2003, 18:17
Canaris Insid: 33 BILLION!. Thats 20% of our gross domestic product for 1 dome!. This is outrageous I....

Aide: Sir.. hate to interrupt, but there's a message from your wife. Squatters have invaded your garden, and are now building a campsite on your front lawn. Oh.. and apparently you are sleeping on the couch tonight

Canaris Insid: What?! Well.. I suppose, if we can agree on some favorable terms. We must insist on domestic labor and resources being used for the projects. Otherwise this will completely destroy our economy, and furthermore, should anything go wrong your compagny will be held accountable!.

Trade Minister Leland McGuiare: Sir. we may need to take up a 100 billion loan as well. *jots down a few notes on a block of paper*, Our economy is growing rapidly, but it will be a few years before we can afford these domes without foreign capital.

Canaris Insid: Very well, send the contract to the bean counters in Finance and put it back on my desk for approval by thursday. This meeting is adjourned.
Der Angst
17-10-2003, 14:44
After handed the paper, he sighs with relief.

They accepted.

He thinks about his family.

They will life...

"Yes, yes, domestic labour etc. is a given, except specialists you don`t have, of course... so, i think we can begin building shortly."