Wombat News
08-09-2003, 11:46
Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks, Wombat News
Rights granted under the provisions of a controversial new law were exercised for the first time late last week as the first Orc-Human marriage was performed in Dryzabone, Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks. The union between Billy Wingnut and Aftik White-Handorc marks the end a five-year struggle that will finally allow those of mixed species to be joined together in “wedded bliss”.
"Oh, my Holy Wombat, this is the happiest day of my life. Now we can go on our honeymoon, and then home and not feel like sinners. Aftik and I are going to make this the most memorable night of our lives. Isn't that right, Affy?" Wingnut said.
Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks is the first state to allow human and orc marriages, having enacted a new law giving them all rights and responsibilities of any other married couple. The law was passed on 27 August after a five-year struggle through the XXXX parliament. Late on 27 August, the last block was cleared as the XXXX Court of Appeal ruled that the law was permitted under the XXXX Constitution.
"Can you believe it? It was sooo amazing when I heard the news," Wingnut said. "When I heard it on Wombat News, I just fell to my knees and cried like a baby. If I was a religious man, I would have thanked the Holy Wombat, but he looks down on people like us. So anyway, after my cry, I went straight over to Affy's place, and we did the wild thing all night. Oh my Holy Wombat, I can't believe I just used that stupid phrase!"
With the new law now in effect, officials are getting ready for the flood of inter-species couples looking to get married.
"Oh man, it's going to be nuts," said Red Necker, state Registrar of Marriages. "All those bloody perverts coming out of the woodwork. You know, the other day I saw this bird with one of those … what the hell are they called ... the really tall, hairy things ... a Wookie … yes, that's it! A Wookie!! Here in Dryzabone. I mean, what the hell is this world coming too? I mean, one time I was really attracted to this nos Fëanor bit of fluff, but that was just a passing phase."
White-Handorc and Wingnut say that they aren't concerning themselves with how they will be perceived outside of Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks, saying that as long as they are happy, the rest of the world can "go to hell”.
"Sah lulabe, ghu. Bloy' ngal, gaho. Qchaw [my] 'ghtaq. Choba' chongr, qaw. Jey, jlba [on your] tln, char 'ghtaq. Mang!" White-Handorc said.
In the short time since the law was passed, 653 inter-species couples have been married and another 7,899 have applied for marriage licenses in Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – FLYING THE FLAG OF INTER-SPECIES HARMONY
Rights granted under the provisions of a controversial new law were exercised for the first time late last week as the first Orc-Human marriage was performed in Dryzabone, Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks. The union between Billy Wingnut and Aftik White-Handorc marks the end a five-year struggle that will finally allow those of mixed species to be joined together in “wedded bliss”.
"Oh, my Holy Wombat, this is the happiest day of my life. Now we can go on our honeymoon, and then home and not feel like sinners. Aftik and I are going to make this the most memorable night of our lives. Isn't that right, Affy?" Wingnut said.
Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks is the first state to allow human and orc marriages, having enacted a new law giving them all rights and responsibilities of any other married couple. The law was passed on 27 August after a five-year struggle through the XXXX parliament. Late on 27 August, the last block was cleared as the XXXX Court of Appeal ruled that the law was permitted under the XXXX Constitution.
"Can you believe it? It was sooo amazing when I heard the news," Wingnut said. "When I heard it on Wombat News, I just fell to my knees and cried like a baby. If I was a religious man, I would have thanked the Holy Wombat, but he looks down on people like us. So anyway, after my cry, I went straight over to Affy's place, and we did the wild thing all night. Oh my Holy Wombat, I can't believe I just used that stupid phrase!"
With the new law now in effect, officials are getting ready for the flood of inter-species couples looking to get married.
"Oh man, it's going to be nuts," said Red Necker, state Registrar of Marriages. "All those bloody perverts coming out of the woodwork. You know, the other day I saw this bird with one of those … what the hell are they called ... the really tall, hairy things ... a Wookie … yes, that's it! A Wookie!! Here in Dryzabone. I mean, what the hell is this world coming too? I mean, one time I was really attracted to this nos Fëanor bit of fluff, but that was just a passing phase."
White-Handorc and Wingnut say that they aren't concerning themselves with how they will be perceived outside of Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks, saying that as long as they are happy, the rest of the world can "go to hell”.
"Sah lulabe, ghu. Bloy' ngal, gaho. Qchaw [my] 'ghtaq. Choba' chongr, qaw. Jey, jlba [on your] tln, char 'ghtaq. Mang!" White-Handorc said.
In the short time since the law was passed, 653 inter-species couples have been married and another 7,899 have applied for marriage licenses in Ecks Ecks Ecks Ecks.
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – FLYING THE FLAG OF INTER-SPECIES HARMONY