Wombat News
28-01-2004, 14:38
In the worldwide mission to search for foreign economists, SATO "intelligence" organisations have stumbled upon the amazing discovery of a land called CACEville, once thought to be fantasy, (http://invisionfree.com/forums/CACE/index.php?act=idx) and have labelled it as a threat to world peace.
This will have far reaching implications as it is said to be the world’s breeding ground for left-wing economists by SATO governments who claim, as well, that it is the hiding place of a rare breed of SeOCCommunist, much to the dismay of children everywhere.
In a statement made by SATO on plans to invade CACEville, it was noted that “the SeOCC regime is oppressing the free Kooks and they must be saved from this tyrannical government who are taking up lethal economic arms. We all know which side their bread is buttered on.”
Which side you butter you bread on, all the way through taking over their vegetable oil reserves has played a part in the reasoning for the announced invasion.
In an attempt to save the Kooks from dying from high cholesterol levels, SATO spokespersons explain that any free nation would not have their bread buttered on top: “We as free individuals enjoy having our bottoms buttered and it is our duty to share this necessity of freedom and democracy. We must break down the walls of the chief SeOCCeroo who has built up a chemical arsenal of non stick oil sprays. First it was cream, then butter, margarine… and now high oleic spray oils are being stockpiled. They clearly pose a threat to democracy everywhere.”
Thus will begin Operation Fox in SeOCCs.
“We all have a stake in this plot of a Big Boy Woomeroo”, exclaimed Mr. Shortone, (the new foreign diplomacy and war minister to CACEville) in protest. “We did have our own cold war but only because butter spoils at room temperature. SATO has no sense of our culture.”
This needs special care in explaining the coming events to the world’s children so as to avoid unnecessary trauma (for the ones that survive anyway). In doing so, world renowned child psychologist Dr. Zeus, said “we must explain the past events leading up to this modern day scenario”. Thus, the child psychologist has written a book for children to adjust to these ideals and to understand the conflict of economies, the world crisis, and foremost, the communication breakdowns in diplomacy that cause war. The publication also ranks as a surprisingly accurate book among adults who recognise cock and bull, as well as deceit, when they hear it.
Here is an example of Dr. Zeus’ children’s book “Fox In SeOCCs” which, as he explains, begins in the usual double-talk of debate that precedes military conflict, and which always leaves children hearing nothing but nonsense while adults pretend to understand it all.
Excerpts from the book:
Take it slowly. This book is dangerous!
Here’s an easy thing to say, here’s an easy game to play. [Illustrations obviously accompany each page which begins with a creature in an unusually tall striped hat seen at a crowded meeting negotiating with another creature about Operation Fox in SeOCCS].
Sam: “Attention! Sam I am! Now, regarding the handling of the SeOCCs situation, I would not could not on a train but I could maybe on a plane, providing that Operation Fox in SeOCCs … ”
Mr Knottox, interrupting: “Wait Mr Speaker. I would not could not with a fox, I would not could not on a box.”
Sam: “I do not like your green eggs and crack, I do not like them. Sam I am!”
Part Two: Foreign Conflict
Sam bends Donnie’s broom. Donnie bends Sam’s broom. Sam’s bends. Sam’s bent broom breaks. Donnie’s bent broom breaks.
Mr Knottox: “Mr. Sam! I hate this game, sir. This game makes my tongue quite lame sir! Operation Fox, sir?!? I wont do it. I cant say it, I won’t chew it!”
Sam: “You won't bite sir???? Very well, sir. Step this way, sir. We’ll find another game to play, sir.”
Sam’s band. Donnie’s band. Military bands. Bandstands. March,march! Pig Band. Big band! Boom!
Mr Knottox: “My poor mouth can’t say that. No sir! My poor mouth is much too slow sir!”
Sam: “Well then bring your mouth this way, I’ll find it something it can say.”
Mr Knottox: "Very well then Mr Sam sir. Let’s have a little talk about Sasky Seetles (a paramilitary faction for the Kooks). Where do you stand on Sasky Seetles?”
Sam: “When a Seetle Sasky fights it’s called … ”
Mr Knottox: “Fox in SeOCCs Operation? I think not sir, Mr Sam sir, our game here is done, sir. I won’t talk such blabber blubber, my tongue isn’t made of rubber!”
Adults noticed no difference between this and their usual diet of television news.
It was later announced that the Sirix will take no part in the new governing of CACEville once Operation Fox in SeOCCs is completed as there will be no trees left. Not anywhere. In the end though, Dr Zeus explained that war can be very educational for children. "Holy Wombat, when I was a little boy, I thought Aperin was a small furry fruit.”
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – TITTLE TATTLE FROM THE FLUBBER LUBBER
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This will have far reaching implications as it is said to be the world’s breeding ground for left-wing economists by SATO governments who claim, as well, that it is the hiding place of a rare breed of SeOCCommunist, much to the dismay of children everywhere.
In a statement made by SATO on plans to invade CACEville, it was noted that “the SeOCC regime is oppressing the free Kooks and they must be saved from this tyrannical government who are taking up lethal economic arms. We all know which side their bread is buttered on.”
Which side you butter you bread on, all the way through taking over their vegetable oil reserves has played a part in the reasoning for the announced invasion.
In an attempt to save the Kooks from dying from high cholesterol levels, SATO spokespersons explain that any free nation would not have their bread buttered on top: “We as free individuals enjoy having our bottoms buttered and it is our duty to share this necessity of freedom and democracy. We must break down the walls of the chief SeOCCeroo who has built up a chemical arsenal of non stick oil sprays. First it was cream, then butter, margarine… and now high oleic spray oils are being stockpiled. They clearly pose a threat to democracy everywhere.”
Thus will begin Operation Fox in SeOCCs.
“We all have a stake in this plot of a Big Boy Woomeroo”, exclaimed Mr. Shortone, (the new foreign diplomacy and war minister to CACEville) in protest. “We did have our own cold war but only because butter spoils at room temperature. SATO has no sense of our culture.”
This needs special care in explaining the coming events to the world’s children so as to avoid unnecessary trauma (for the ones that survive anyway). In doing so, world renowned child psychologist Dr. Zeus, said “we must explain the past events leading up to this modern day scenario”. Thus, the child psychologist has written a book for children to adjust to these ideals and to understand the conflict of economies, the world crisis, and foremost, the communication breakdowns in diplomacy that cause war. The publication also ranks as a surprisingly accurate book among adults who recognise cock and bull, as well as deceit, when they hear it.
Here is an example of Dr. Zeus’ children’s book “Fox In SeOCCs” which, as he explains, begins in the usual double-talk of debate that precedes military conflict, and which always leaves children hearing nothing but nonsense while adults pretend to understand it all.
Excerpts from the book:
Take it slowly. This book is dangerous!
Here’s an easy thing to say, here’s an easy game to play. [Illustrations obviously accompany each page which begins with a creature in an unusually tall striped hat seen at a crowded meeting negotiating with another creature about Operation Fox in SeOCCS].
Sam: “Attention! Sam I am! Now, regarding the handling of the SeOCCs situation, I would not could not on a train but I could maybe on a plane, providing that Operation Fox in SeOCCs … ”
Mr Knottox, interrupting: “Wait Mr Speaker. I would not could not with a fox, I would not could not on a box.”
Sam: “I do not like your green eggs and crack, I do not like them. Sam I am!”
Part Two: Foreign Conflict
Sam bends Donnie’s broom. Donnie bends Sam’s broom. Sam’s bends. Sam’s bent broom breaks. Donnie’s bent broom breaks.
Mr Knottox: “Mr. Sam! I hate this game, sir. This game makes my tongue quite lame sir! Operation Fox, sir?!? I wont do it. I cant say it, I won’t chew it!”
Sam: “You won't bite sir???? Very well, sir. Step this way, sir. We’ll find another game to play, sir.”
Sam’s band. Donnie’s band. Military bands. Bandstands. March,march! Pig Band. Big band! Boom!
Mr Knottox: “My poor mouth can’t say that. No sir! My poor mouth is much too slow sir!”
Sam: “Well then bring your mouth this way, I’ll find it something it can say.”
Mr Knottox: "Very well then Mr Sam sir. Let’s have a little talk about Sasky Seetles (a paramilitary faction for the Kooks). Where do you stand on Sasky Seetles?”
Sam: “When a Seetle Sasky fights it’s called … ”
Mr Knottox: “Fox in SeOCCs Operation? I think not sir, Mr Sam sir, our game here is done, sir. I won’t talk such blabber blubber, my tongue isn’t made of rubber!”
Adults noticed no difference between this and their usual diet of television news.
It was later announced that the Sirix will take no part in the new governing of CACEville once Operation Fox in SeOCCs is completed as there will be no trees left. Not anywhere. In the end though, Dr Zeus explained that war can be very educational for children. "Holy Wombat, when I was a little boy, I thought Aperin was a small furry fruit.”
THIS BROADCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY WOMBAT NEWS – TITTLE TATTLE FROM THE FLUBBER LUBBER
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid87/pda22c0ab2140ceb42cbbf0f2271afd5b/fa9f249c.jpg